A Love For Lust
by RayneKaplan
Summary: Bella and Jacob are married, but something is going on in Jacob's life that Bella doesn't know. How does she react with her best friend by her side? All human, sorry.
1. Prologue

Stephenie Meyer owns everything. I own none of these characters at all. I'm far too cheap.

* * *

**Prologue  
**  
"Is there anything you're keeping from me that you'd like to tell me?" I asked him in a sleepy and dazed sort of voice.

"No, nothing I can think of," Jacob replied back to me, his mind clearly going to the place of dreams.

"Are you sure?" I pushed, feeling that there really _was_ something that needed to be said. He softly kissed my forehead and nuzzled me under his chin, stroking my hair softly with his hand and then wrapping me up into a tight, secure hug.

"Just go to sleep, Bella. There's nothing that you don't know."

I let my eyes close as I flashed brief memories through my head, trying to choose something to dream about. I went through many memories, fishing for a happy one. Meeting Jacob, our wedding day, when we found out we were expecting, the birth of Claire, all of Claire's milestones, the second positive pregnancy test--I paused to rub my engorged abdomen, which poked and prodded as I did so. I thought about the future a little bit and began feeling my body fall into a deep sleep, bringing the night's dream to my mind. It was nothing I thought of and nothing I'd ever imagine.

I was walking through my house, but I was also watching myself walk through the house. I figure this is as close as you could get to a out-of-body experience. I stopped in the living room and saw the toys strewn across the floor. Blocks, stuffed animals, balls, all just thrown about like a whirlwind had come through. I highly assumed the whirlwind was named Claire and she was taking a nap. I shook my head at the sight, wondering why Jacob couldn't just pick up a few things.

I turned into the kitchen and saw the kitchen sink was full of dirty plates, the trash needed to be taken out, and there was food left out on the counter that needed to be put back into the refrigerator. I sighed. None of the cleaning would get done around here if not for me.

_I hope Jacob appreciates the things I do for him_, I thought.

I put the food back into the refrigerator and continued walking through the house. I walked down the hallway and stopped in front of the first door.

I slowly and quietly opened the door to the bedroom and saw my assumptions were correct. Claire lay there in her small bed, still and serene, breathing in rhythmic intervals. There was no telling what her little mind was dreaming about.

As I turned and began walking through the door way, doorknob in hand preparing to slowly latch the door, I heard a noise from behind the door further down the hallway. Jacob must be in there watching television. I was wondering where he was. I walked to the door and stopped dead in my tracks. There was another voice from behind the door. A woman's voice. And the television wasn't on.

I threw the door open and saw what was happening in my own home, in my own bed, but it wasn't anything I wanted to believe. Jacob was laying there, fully nude but covered with a blanket, with a woman beside him. The woman was fully nude, smoking a cigarette, and her face was glazed over in shock. Jacob, his face awkwardly looking like a deer trapped in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle, began sputtering over himself, trying to get words out in the form of an explanation.

"I--I--Bella! What are you doing home? You're not supposed to be back for another hour. I didn't think you would be here!"

As I tried to speak, I realized my jaw was frozen in place, dropped almost to the floor. I knew my face had to be as glazed over as his. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, I composed myself enough to talk. Surprisingly, it was calm and not a shrieking fit.

"I got bored walking around and decided to come back home. I thought we could put Claire down for her nap and spend some time together, but I see you're busy--" I trailed off.

I realized there was salt water on my lips and my vision was blurring. I touched my cheek and felt the small stream of moisture. I was crying.

I looked at the woman who was on my side of my bed. She put her cigarette out in a black, plastic ashtray she must've brought to the house, it looked new with only a few cigarette butts in it, and grabbed a new one from the pack that was sitting near the ashtray and lit it. _Misty Menthol Ultra Light 100s_. She looked at me and I realized that I couldn't make out the true features her face. No matter how blurred my vision was because of the tears, no matter how clear I could make my vision if I stopped crying, this woman's distinguishing features were unclear. I supposed it was better that way, that I never really wanted to know who this woman was. Despite not being able to make out her face, I could tell that there was a look of accomplishment on it. She opened her mouth to speak, and a grin of satisfaction slipped from her lips.

"You see," she said, "he was never happy, not with you. Maybe you should learn the things I know. Maybe you should learn how to keep him happy. That way you know who he's laying with each night. I mean, he's absolutely great, far better than my husband, but I have a husband to keep happy, too. I can't keep coming around to please yours."

She took a drag of her long cigarette and the smell of the smoke burned my nostrils. I couldn't move. I just wanted to turn and get Claire, hop back into the car, and just drive away, but my feet and legs were frozen. All I could do was stand in place and sob as I felt the burn of her eyes bore into me, full of glee, excitement, joy as she was reveling in someone else's pain aside from her own. Like her void was being filled the more I cried. I tried to compose myself as Jacob tried to explain.

"It hasn't been going on that long at all. Just a couple times, I swear it. You know I never meant to hurt you. It's just that…well, with you being pregnant you're always tired and I have some needs that you're not wanting to fulfill."

I jolted my head up from my hands.

"YOU have needs?!" I yelled at him. "I cook for you, I clean for you, I do EVERYTHING for you so that you can come home and sit on your lazy ass and not do a thing and you're going to tell me that YOU have needs that I don't fulfill?! What about ME, Jacob!? What about the things I want? What about the things I need?!"

I collapsed to the floor, shaking violently, and he slowly began making his way to me.

"Don't you come near me," I spit through my teeth at him. "You're nothing but a little boy when I thought I was getting a man. Boy, was I wrong."

Jacob sat on the bed, still as a statue. He watched me as I began violently shaking in ripples from sobs again and began to get up. The woman put her hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"She doesn't want you, remember? That's why you have me. I can make you happy the ways she can't. I'm what you want. She's nothing."

* * *

Reviews are appreciated. :)  
Hope you enjoyed! And mucho thanks to my counterpart, my Alice if you will, **KristineMcCarty**.


	2. Chapter 1

Here's the deal. Stephenie Meyer owns the characters, I'm not trying to claim them. Just using them for a whole new story. Word? Word._

* * *

_

I shot straight up in bed, soaked from a large puddle of my own sweat and tears. I looked at the clock. The red, digital LED lights seemed to scream at me. 3:12am. I sighed and laid back down, my head aching. I looked over at Jacob and saw that he looked very comfortable, very serene. Whatever he was dreaming about, he was happy. I cursed him silently under my breath. It took all of me not to jump on top of him, wrap my shaking hands around his neck, and just begin choking him. Choking him and shaking him rapidly in a fit if fury, hoping to snap his neck.

But I didn't.

Instead, I got out of bed, which is more of a chore than an easy task at 30 weeks pregnant. It took about two or three tries until my swollen feet finally reached the carpeted floor. I stood slowly, my joints and back cracking and popping as I stretched upright. I yawned and walked out through the door into the hallway light.

I squinted hard and shielded my eyes with my hand. The light wasn't very bright but it was enough to sting. I waited until my eyes adjusted and walked to the living room, stopping by the kitchen to make myself a cup of hot green tea. With cup in hand, I walked into the living room and grabbed a large book from the bookshelf. I sat on our comfortable, beige, micro suede couch and placed the book in what was left of my lap that my stomach hadn't taken over yet.

The cold, blue, plastic cover sent shivers down my spine and goose bumps all over my body. I turned on the lamp beside me so I could see. With my index finger, I traced the golden script on the outside of the book.

"Memories", I murmured under my breath as I opened the book to the first page. I remembered the moments these pictures captured as clear as if they had happened only days ago instead of years. I touched the plastic film the pictures were protected by and drifted away into my memories.

_The sun was high in the sky, blinding me every which way I turned. Despite it being the end of October, it was pleasantly comfortable outside in the light breeze that swept my hair from side to side. I was standing beside Jacob, trembling nervously. We were on the steps of our county's courthouse, waiting to go inside and officially become man and wife. As my body shook, I could feel the ring bouncing around in one hand and heard the rustling of our legal documents in the other. _

_"Are you nervous?" Jacob asked me with a look of both worry and amusement. I could never understand how someone could have the look of two different extremes on their face at the same time. _

_"I'll be fine," I responded, "once my legs become legs again instead of forms of jell-o. I mean, we're just getting married. It's no big deal." _

_His eyes twinkled at me as he picked up on my sarcasm. Not only was I saying that to reassure him, I was trying to reassure myself. The idea of me plunging into marriage at such a young age left me breathless. I couldn't help but wonder if I was making a mistake in my decision, if we should just wait a big longer. The doubts flooded my head as we walked through the door at our awaited appointment time. _

_The courthouse had a musty scent and was very old and large, but gorgeous in its own way. In the lobby, there were fliers, bulletins, and pamphlets on almost anything your mind could conjure up. I was surrounded in pictures of lost dogs, information on state taxes, the changing holiday hours, and busy-looking people dressed in suits and skirts, all of varying shades of gray. We walked slowly to the large desk ahead of us, where an older looking woman was sitting, her hair pinned into a bun with a yellow wooden pencil, her glasses sitting right on the edge of her nose, and a look on her face that screamed she was only doing this job for the money and benefits. _

_"Hello, ma'am. We're looking for Room 202. We're scheduled to be married today by Reverend Weber." _

_How Jacob could speak so calmly at a time like this was beyond me. I knew that if any words escaped my mouth at the moment, they would be as shaky as my body movements were. The woman behind the desk looked up at us and sighed, waving us down a well-lit hallway. _

_"It's down at the end. You can't miss it." Her tone of voice was quite dull, almost as dull as the outfit she was wearing. Jacob grabbed my hand and gave it a quick squeeze. _

_"You're sure about this, right?" Carter asked with deep meaning behind his hazel eyes. "You have no doubts about me? You could see yourself spending the rest of your life with me? I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do just because I love you and I want to." _

_I now picked up on the shake in Jacob's voice, his nervousness slowly coming into the light. I stroked his smooth chin softly with my fingers, tracing his jaw line, and stared deeply into his eyes. _

_"I'm sure," I replied. "Jacob, you're everything I've been looking for. You make me happier than I could ever imagine. The only thing that could ever surpass the happiness that I have when I'm with you is if I was your wife." _

_With that, I gave his hand a gentle squeeze and led him down the bright hallway that, in my opinion, was using far too many fluorescent lights, squinting the entire way with a wide grin on my face and a mix of knots and butterflies in my stomach. _

_Reverend Weber was a rather large man who resembled a Santa Claus I often saw at the mall around Christmas. He had sparkling blue eyes and a smile that could brighten anyone's day. _

_"Hello!" He boomed out with a voice almost as large as he. "I take it you're Jacob and Bella? I'm Reverend Weber and I'll be marrying you today. Now, since it is so stuffy in here," he paused to loosen the tie around his neck, "I wondered if you would like to do this outside. The leaves on the trees would make the perfect scenery for everything." Not once did the smile leave his face, and his great mood was contagious. Almost instantly, the knots in my stomach disappeared and I turned to Jacob. _

_"It's up to you." Jacob looked at me, frozen as if he was afraid of doing the wrong thing. _

_"Buddy, this is the last decision you get to make on your own for the rest of your life," Reverend Weber said as he patted Jacob on the shoulder. "Let's just do it right outside in the gazebo out front." _

_There we stood, the breeze flowing through the spaces of our fingers as we held each other's hand, anticipating the moment when we would hear "I now pronounce you husband and wife." _

_Being outside was a good choice. The leaves had barely begun to fall and were an amazing assortment of reds, oranges, and browns. It was absolutely perfect, like everything I dreamed it would be since I was 7. I looked at Jacob and could read the sheer excitement in his face, his eyes glistening in the sunlight, a grin stretching ear to ear. _

_As we patiently waited, I couldn't help but look at my beautiful ring. Jacob had made a great choice. The ½ carat diamond and the small diamond fragments surrounding it were sparkling in the sunlight, sending shimmers of light dancing all around us. There was intricate designs engraved into the white gold surrounding the diamond and inside an inscription read "for all eternity". _

_I smiled and looked up, only to see Jacob staring at Reverend Weber, his eyes wide as he knew what words would be spoken next. _

_"Ahem," Reverend Weber cleared his throat. "By the power invested in me by the state of Washington, I now pronounce you husband an--" He was cut off by Jacob, who somewhat attacked me in a kiss that sent an electrical current throughout my entire body. _

_He held me close to him and for that brief moment in time, nothing else in the world mattered. It was just me and him, together. Our bodies fit together like the two pieces of a puzzle, and I never wanted to let go. I wanted this to be my forever and I knew I would have it for as long as I could keep it. _

I let out a deep sigh. That was back when Jacob and I were happy. We had the newlywed bug that never seemed to want to go away, but it eventually did. I began flipping through the pages and filled my head with memories that each picture had captured with it. The honeymoon at Niagara Falls, which I loved but Jacob seemed to think it was overplayed by many couples around the United States, the first meal I had cooked for dinner, which was burnt to a point where you could never tell it was chicken, but Jacob ate it anyway with a smile on his face insisting the entire time to take a picture so we would know it could never get worse than that, the house we found in a quiet little subdivision located on a cul-de-sac that was the epitome of our dream home, and then to the house we had to settle on when we realized our dream home was out of our budget. The dream home was picturesque. It was 2 stories tall, built with deep red, almost mahogany brick. The backyard, which I could picture children in whereas Jacob could picture his horseshoe pit, barbeque area, the typical male things, was lined with a privacy fence and quite spacious. The open floor plan of the living room, kitchen, and dining area put me at a loss for words. The open space was filled with sunlight through the large picture windows and the marble floors of the kitchen and dining area and sparkled like the bottom of a clear, clean brook in the countryside. The living room was very welcoming and the beige carpet felt like a cloud under your feet. The bedrooms had this same carpet, along with well-lit and rather large closets. The things I could fit in those closets! And the bathrooms! The main bathroom had marble countertops along with the same marble floor as the kitchen and dining area. The bathtub was so large, it would probably accommodate Reverend Weber himself. The master bathroom had the same marble countertops and marble floor, but had my jaw dropped when the sight of the Jacuzzi tub entered my line of vision. I could imagine myself sitting in the hot bath with bubbles surrounding me, candles lit all around, soaking all my cares and troubles away. But that was a dream that would never happen, not in this lifetime at least. The house we settled on was only one story and far smaller than the dream house, but it was still our home. It was cozy, welcoming, and though it wasn't the Taj Mahal, it was our home and we loved every nook and cranny of it, from the small bedrooms to the even smaller bathrooms to the worn down carpet beneath our feet. It was ours.

It was just me and Jacob for year. Throughout that year, we spent many nights watching movies, cuddling on the couch by the fire that was playing via DVD on the television, just spending precious time together. We stayed up a few nights, simply talking about the future and what may come of it. We discussed how long we would wait before starting a family, which we had decided on a few more years, what we would name our children, how many children we would have, and perhaps adding a dog into the mix. They were fun conversations full of laughter and happiness. Our plans abruptly changed a few days after the new year was brought in.

We found out that we were expecting our first child, years before we were even considering having one. We were shocked, horrified, and swore off sex for the longest time, though that longest time was only 2 days once we realized that since I was already pregnant the chances of me getting pregnant again throughout the duration of the 40 weeks gestation was non-existent. Even then, we were quite hesitant towards each other. Most of all, I was scared. I was still young and unaware if I would be capable of being a mother. I had no doubts about Jacob. I had seen the way he reacted with his nieces and nephews, the way he adored them just as much as they adored him, and I knew that he would be fine. But I was never around children under the age of 3. I was clueless on everything, from how to change a diaper to how long before a child could actually eat baby food. I signed up for every class possible the hospital had given for taking care of a newborn to help prepare myself. When we found out we were having a girl, I remember the tears welling up in Jacob's eyes as he looked at the screen attached to the ultrasound machine. "That's my little girl," he whispered under his breath, "and no one will ever be good enough for her." My heart melted into a puddle of love. When we left from the ultrasound, he insisted that I drive home so that he could rub my protruding stomach and tell her how much we loved her. We decided to name her Renesmee, my little piece of Heaven. She was our little miracle.

As much as I loved my little miracle, I did NOT love giving birth to her. 36 hours of excruciating back labor with contractions that made getting drop-kicked to the stomach repeatedly sound appealing. Just when I had thought I'd lost all motivation, when I thought my body was ready to give up, our little girl made her debut into the world with bright, wide, curious eyes and a shriek that would call dogs from miles away. As I held her, all bundled up in her receiving blankets from the hospital, I studied her face and was overcome with emotion as I realized that she was just NOT a Renesmee. The name just didn't suit her. The tears streamed down my face as I tried to figure out what to do in this situation. Jacob and I went back and forth on names, none of which we could agree on. Finally, Jacob threw out the name "Claire". My miracle's eyes opened wide at the sound of this name. She had decided herself that her name was Claire and we were okay with that. We were our own little family, Jacob, Claire, and me. We were happy.

The happiness soon faded once we were home with Claire alone. Everything I was taught in my classes seemed to disappear from my memory. Between Claire's high-pitched shrills and the lack of sleep in almost a week, fuses in our household were very short and growing shorter by the minute. After a few weeks, we were settled into a routine and things calmed down. Claire was everything I could imagine my child to be, full of spunk even at a young age. She always kept Jacob and me on our toes, but unfortunately there was little time left for Jacob and me to have time alone. This created a void in our relationship, one that could never be repaired, especially since neither one of us was willing to take any steps in repairing it. We would much rather blame the other for our unhappiness. But never did we show any signs of stress, tension, or rage in front of Claire. It was hard to. Her gummy grin and lit up eyes were enough to put Winnie-the-Pooh's friend, Eeyore, into a good mood. But, no matter how many happy faces we would put on to show the world that we were okay, deep down we both knew that we were not who we used to be. We didn't appreciate each other like we once did. We didn't love like we once did. We would never be the happily married Jacob and Bella.

I blinked and a droplet of water fell onto the page of the photo album, hitting our family picture which included a fake smile on my face as well as Jacob. I hadn't realized that I had begun tearing up, remembering how happy we once were. I reached for my green tea and realized that somewhere throughout fishing through my memories, I had finished it and was now trying to get nonexistent droplets to fall from my cup into my mouth. The attempt was unsuccessful and I was only halfway through the photo album. With a deep breath, I began my adventure of trying to get up from the couch to fix another cup of tea. This could almost be considered an Olympic event with as many maneuvers it took for me to get halfway. I imagine I'd only score a 6.5, seeing as most of my maneuvers were unsuccessful at the task at hand. This pregnancy could only be the workings of Satan himself, because my birth control worked fine up until 7 months ago when I went for a refill and received a faulty batch of pills. Apparently, I wasn't the only woman in this boat of agony. I'm smiled to myself, reveling in the imaginary thoughts of other women struggling as hard as I am. It was strangely comforting knowing I wasn't alone.

As I put a pot of water on the stove to boil, I looked at the clock. The green digital numbers told me it was 4:36am. Despite how late, or how early, it was, I just wasn't tired. I sat for a few minutes in the kitchen, staring at the pot of water waiting for it to boil. I soon became bored and decided to check my E-mail. My inbox was flooded with ads from multiple sites. I begin weeding through them and stumble across an E-mail address that I don't recognize. Though I know it's a bad move, I open it and begin reading.

**Dear Jacob,  
I had a really great time tonight. Maybe we could do it again sometime? Let me know when you have the free time. **

**Tanya**

My mind is frozen and my body is numb. My heart feels like it's ready to break into a thousand pieces. What does this mean? He didn't go out tonight. He was running errands. He had to pick up a few groceries, pay some bills, there's no way he could…could he? My frozen mind suddenly became rapidly thinking thoughts that I tried to push away. I tried to think logically, but couldn't grasp a handle on the logic I needed. As I try to calmly figure this out on my own, I hear my pot on the stove rumbling. My water is boiling. Just what I need. A hot glass of tea and then off to bed. This should help me clear my mind. As I pour the boiling water over the teabag in my cup, I try to get the thoughts to subdue in my mind, failing at each effort. I let the teabag steep and jump back on the computer. I need a friend. I pull up the E-mail address and begin writing.

**Alice,  
I don't know what to do. My mind is going 90 to nothing. I found an E-mail from a woman in our inbox for Jacob saying she had a good time tonight and wants to do it again, whatever "it" is. I can't help but keep thinking the worst. He would never try to cheat on me, right? He loves me. I love him. I'm just being silly, right? I'm over-analyzing things, as usual. I'm thinking too deeply and it's going to get me into hot water. I just need to stop and get over it, right? Or maybe I can't stop thinking about it because my intuition is trying to tell me something? Oh, who am I to talk about intuition. My intuition sucks. Ugh, Alice just please tell me I'm overreacting. **

**Bella**

I slumped back into the uncomfortable and quite unsteady chair and put my hands on my head, covering my eyes, as I tried to think. I just have to be over thinking. Don't worry. Bella will E-mail me tomorrow and definitely tell me that I'm just being stupid and I should just forget about it because it's just an E-mail and knowing my luck, it's probably just SPAM from some website using a fake E-mail address. The kind of websites that always end up screwing up marriages because the wives are snoopy and find them and then accuse their husbands of cheating on them. But that won't be me. Nope. I'm fine with this. It's just a fluke. It's nothing. I keep telling myself these things as I grab my hot tea and drink it quickly. The sooner I get to bed, the better. I get to wake up tomorrow with a fresh day and I get to make it any way I want it. I finished my tea, put my cup in the sink, and went back into the bedroom. I look at the bed and there's Jacob, sprawled as if he cannot get enough room in our king-sized bed. As if I didn't have enough troubles with moving around, I climb into bed and with small grunting noises move Jacob's limp body back to his side of the bed and cover him up. I lay my head on my pillow, rub my belly as if to say "good night", and close my eyes. Not long after, I feel something hit my head. Jacob is rolling around and smacking me with his flailing limbs. I sigh and roll over to the edge of the bed, just so I'm taking up as little room as possible. I don't have high hopes for tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 2

Characters are Stephenie Meyer's. Word._

* * *

_

_Thud!_

The sound shook me from my sleep in such a state of shock that almost caused me to forget where I was. As I began to collect my thoughts, I heard more noises. Shaking, rattling, banging, all from the wall behind our cluttered, disheveled closet. I knew what the sound was. It was the monster behind the wall, taking what seemed like desperate measures to wake me from my restless slumber. All I had to do was wait for the monster to call for me…

"Mama! 'ake up!"

There was my cue from the monster better known as Claire. Now, I can't lie. Claire is a great little girl. She's very bright and very adorable. She's also very much a toddler. She enjoys finding things that she sees as a problem or an obstacle and she takes those things as a personal challenge to solve. Her newest challenge? The cabinet safety locks in the kitchen and bathroom.

"MAMA! 'AKE UP! TIME TO PLAY!"

With a huge sigh, I began the 15 minute process to get myself in the sitting position to be able to swing my legs over to the side and get up. It started with me somewhat rolling to my side, only to have to roll back because of my sciatic nerve. This baby just seemed to love laying in every which way to make me the most uncomfortable. I rolled a second time, but unfortunately overdid it. My round belly acted as a ball and I balanced for a few seconds before finally falling back into my starting position. I rolled a third time, but this time I grabbed the sheet on the side of me, the only thing keeping me in this position. I've already broken a sweat and I'm barely there, but staying on my side seems like a miracle. I get my arm underneath me and begin resting my weight onto it, pulling myself up slowly. The entire time, I hear my joints popping loudly, letting out a yawn sounding more like a black bear waking from hibernation with a roar. I'm finally in the sitting position and I can't help let a smile creep from my lips. This is like me winning the gold medal at the Olympics. Really, men don't realize how hard pregnancy is.

With a sigh and a grunt, I maneuver myself to the edge of my bed and place my feet on the worn down, beige carpet. I allow myself one final stretch and stand up, only to fall back down at the sudden feel of vertigo. Once I get my bearings back, I stand again and begin shuffling through a sea of dirty clothes on our floor. If only Jacob learned how to use a laundry basket, things would be so much easier. I wipe the sweat from my brow and finally make it to the bedroom door. As I turn the knob, Claire hears the sound and knows that I'm awake.

"MAMA! MAMA! MAMA!"

Her excitement sends happiness through my veins, like a huge endorphin rush. With as bad as my night was, it's really nice that someone is looking forward to seeing me. I smile and throw the door open. As soon as I do, a sudden burst of pink nearly tramples me in the hallway.

"Claire! Where are you going in such a hurry?" I ask her with a grin on my face. I already know the answer to this. All it takes is one word.

"Dora!" she exclaims as she makes her way into the living room to turn on the television and wait impatiently with the remote in her hands for me to put her favorite DVD in for her. As I walk into the living room, she hands me the remote with a smile on her face almost stretching past her cheeks. Apparently, someone got a better chance at sleep than I had.

"Peeze?" she asked with her head cocked to the side of her shoulder and her arms crossed behind her back, as if she knew being cute would help her get her way. I couldn't help but let a giggle escape my lips as I turned on the television, then the DVD player. As Claire heard the sound of the previews from her DVD, she plopped herself down in the middle of the living room with her eyes glued to the television, waiting for it to start.

"Dank dou." She's quite polite for her age, though most people don't realize what she's saying half the time. With me being with her every moment, I know that she's thanking me. I go into the kitchen and prepare our breakfast. Pancakes, toast, and some milk. The aroma of the pancakes cooking on the griddle was intoxicating to me. Perhaps this next baby will be just as infatuated with pancakes as Claire. I flipped them all, inhaling deeply at the smell each time, and waited impatiently for when they'd be done. As I waited, the toast popped out of the toaster oven, slightly crispy but never burned. Thankfully, mastering the toaster was one of the things I accomplished early on. My first memory with a toaster was not a pleasant one that included my favorite Malibu Barbie doll that desperately wanted a tan. It ended in bright orange flames, a fire extinguisher, and 2 weeks of being grounded. Since then, I've become a guru at working them.

Soon after the toast had butter and grape jam, the pancakes were done. I put two on the plate for Claire, two on the plate for me, and a stack of the leftovers on a separate plate. I knew I'd be back for a second serving. I went into the living room, armed with two cups of milk and our plates, and sat them on the coffee table. This was our morning routine, to sit very relaxed together beside the coffee table and enjoy our breakfast with no rush. Before we got to eat, I quickly grabbed a diaper and diaper wipes and changed Claire. She wasn't one to eat with a dirty diaper. When we were both content, we sat on the couch and slowly ate. I took it slow, putting my feet up on the chair beside me and enjoying my time before the hectic day. Claire ate even slower, engulfed by the television. When we finished, I brought the dishes into the kitchen and, while Claire finished watching her DVD, I washed the dishes quickly and proceeded to the computer. I knew it was early yet and I wasn't expecting a reply, but I had to check my E-mail. I had to see if Alice wrote me back, just so I had some reassurance.

I wiggled the gray mouse around to inactivate the screensaver, which looked like an ocean floor full of fun fish and other creatures. After the blue screen light blinded me, I waited for what seemed like an eternity for our old, slow computer to load. We really needed an upgrade. After 5 minutes, everything seemed caught up and the orange blinking light seemed to be at a stand still, so I went to our E-mail provider's site and poised my fingers over the keyboard, ready to type in our screen name and password. Oddly enough, I was already logged in. That shouldn't be. It usually will automatically log me out after a few hours of not being online. I suppose I really didn't get enough sleep. I look through the inbox and realize three things. One, we get entirely too much SPAM. I need to get a filter for that. Two, Alice actually got back to me already. That was quick for her. Maybe her insomnia is getting worse. Three, the E-mail from Tanya is gone. Before doing anything else, I go to our deleted E-mails. They've all been deleted permanently. To catch myself from going into a fit of rage without any understanding, I begin to try to think rationally. Jacob meant to get online to pay some bills, maybe he woke up early to do that and saw the E-mail. It must've really been SPAM after all. Yes, I believe that.

I quickly filter through the SPAM messages, muttering under my breath about how I really didn't need male enhancement, that I didn't want a "FREE* Gift Card" for anywhere, and that I was fairly content with my breast size. Finally, I was to Alice's E-mail. She must've mailed this after Jacob was online. Thank God for her timing. I opened it and began reading.

**Bella,  
I'm sure everything is fine. You were just so tired last night (yes, I saw what time you sent that E-mail! You need to start sleeping better!) and your pregnancy brain probably messed with your head. Jacob would never hurt you like that. You mean too much to him. I know he's an ass sometimes, but he married you and he knows it. He's not stupid. He loves you. I wouldn't worry about it. You better call me soon. I want to know how my Claire is doing! And OH MY GOD I need to tell you about this guy I met at the club the other night! Dude, he is SO hot! I could almost swear he looked like a freaking Greek God with his abs! And did I ever tell you about my mom's new boyfriend? I think this one's a keeper. Not to mention his car…**

Alice 

I let out a sigh with somewhat of a laugh. I love Alice. She's the best friend anyone could ever have. If she could blow off all that, I should be able to, too. It helps that she has ADD like you wouldn't believe. She may always be there for me to show support, but she's most definitely always there when I need to clear my mind of something. Right now, Alice was doing that. She was clearing my mind for me. I could never thank her enough.

After turning off the computer, I walked back into the living room just as Claire's DVD was finishing. I changed her diaper again and took her into the bathroom with me to get dressed and let me wash my face and do all the normal morning things everyone needs to do. I finished up with myself first and kept Claire occupied with some random toys she had for bath time. I got her dressed and brushed her bird's nest of a hairdo out, putting it into a pouf-like ponytail on top of her head with a "snag proof" rubber band. We brushed our teeth and stood in front of the large, full size mirror.

"Pwetty." Claire smiled as she spun around, looking at her reflection every which way possible, and making herself dizzy. She fell to the ground giggling loudly and I couldn't help but laugh with her. At the sound of Claire's laughter, my abdomen began to vigorously jump, shift, and move. The baby already understands Claire's voice and loves it. Claire loves it, too. She took notice almost automatically, placed her hand on top of my belly, and rubbed it in a circular motion, as I showed her how to do.

"Baby in der." She told me with pride in her voice. She quickly kissed my belly button, making sure to saturate every area possible with her drool from cutting her molars, and looked up at me with her big, brown, slightly almond shaped eyes.

"Park?" The hope gleaming in the look of her face, I melted.

"Yes, Little One. We'll go to the park."

* * *

Reviews are nice. :)  
Props to **KristineMcCarty**. She's amazzzzing.


	4. Chapter 3

Again, the characters are Stephenie Meyers' idea. Not mine. I own nothing.

* * *

We packed up a bag of snacks, a light coat as a precaution, and headed out. Once Claire was strapped into her stroller, we made the long and winding, uphill battle to the park. The park is only a half-mile away, at most, but it's all up a steep hill and is shaped like a snake slithered the path. It's a rough walk, one that always guarantees breaking a sweat, red cheeks, heavy panting, and sometimes a few blisters.

When we finally made it to the park, I got Claire out of our stroller and let her play around. Luckily enough, the park is surrounded by homes of other women with kids Claire's age, who all trickled out of their doors with eager toddlers pulling alongside them, trying to hurry to play. Though our kids all played together, I never really found myself socializing with the wives. They were like a clique I wasn't allowed in. They had standards that I didn't meet, one being that I was about 10 years younger than them. Though we never exchanged anything but a polite smile, we all watched the kids instead of specifically our own. We looked out for each other's children.

After about a half hour of watching the children, my mind began to wander around the group of ladies. I always wondered what they were talking about and all the gossip I was missing out on. I'm not one for gossip, but sometimes a bit of conversation is nice. I scanned the playground, giving a polite nod to the ladies I recognized from other trips to the park Claire and I had taken.

There was one woman in particular that always caught my attention. She always had her two children with her, a boy and a girl. The little boy looked about Claire's age, but the little girl had to be a bit older. She always seemed to keep to herself, quietly in the shadows of the rusted blue metal bench under one of the largest oak trees ever imaginable. The reason she caught my attention was that she always seemed to be shunned from the other wives. I never knew who she was, just that no one ever wanted to talk to her, not a word. At that moment, I decided that I would muster up the courage and try to make a new friend. At least one of us should be courteous.

I walked in slow, long strides to where she was sitting and felt all eyes on me from the other wives surrounding us, the glares burning into the back of my head. I could see their lips move quickly as they muttered things under their breath. I didn't care.

As I closed in on the woman's location, she looked up from the shard of grass she was staring at on the ground and looked up, eyebrows raised. She looked quite familiar at this distance, but I couldn't put my finger as to where I knew her from. I waved to Claire as she slid down the cold, metal slide and sat down. The only sound for what seemed like forever was the creaking the old bench was making, groaning at the extra weight it now had to hold.

"Hi! My name is Bella. My little girl, Claire, is the one over there, eating the dirt -- Claire! STOP!"

She couldn't help but laugh at the sight of my little girl holding the clump of brown earth in her small hand, taking small bites and leaving a brown mark around her lips. Claire looked up at me and hid her dirt clump behind her back, trying to hide what she was doing.

"They're tricky, aren't they?" She spoke. I was in shock.

"Y-y-yeah, they really are," I managed to sputter out. Things fell back to the quiet stillness then, as we both fished for things to converse about. Occasionally, you would see one of us take a deep breath, as if to begin speaking, but the breath always ended with a large gust of wind coming from our mouths.

"So, you said your name is Bella?" She asked, trying to make small talk.

"Yep. And Claire is that little terror over there. My husband's name is Jacob, but he's at work most of the time." My response seemed almost scripted.

"I'm Tanya, but everyone calls me Anya. My husband works a lot, too, so it's usually just me and the kids as well." She flashed a small smile at me and at once I knew her guard was down. I slowly let mine as she continued the conversation.

"My little girl's name is Kate and my little boy is Garrett. I swear they get everything from there dad. So many people wonder if he had them before me and I just adopted them but I promise I'm their real mom. We share mitochondrial DNA and everything."

I let a laugh burst through my lips. She seemed like someone I could really get along with. Sarcasm and dry humor are my favorite traits in my friends. Heck, Alice is that and then some. She about puts me to shame. I hoped we would get along quite well.

"So, when are you due? Do you know what this one is?" She continued the conversation.

"My due date is June 5th, but we're thinking I might have to go in a bit sooner. There's been a few complications with my blood pressure rising and falling and I had to go in once with preterm labor, but aside from that it's been okay. We're having another little girl, and I am NOT prepared for the drama that comes with it."

She threw her head back and laughed. Okay, more like cackled. It was a laugh that somewhat reminded me of the Wicked Witch from the West in The Wizard of Oz. I looked past that, though, reminding myself that my husband didn't have a very good and normal laugh either.

"Girls are harder, I'm with you on that one. It always seems like everything just has to be so-so to please them. No stains here, nothing dirty there, but Claire doesn't seem to be going through that yet." Her eyes trailed as she finished her sentence, pointing me to Claire, who was sitting in the middle of the playground, covered head to toe in dirt. As my eyes met Claire's, she froze in place. She always seemed to think that if she just stopped moving, she became invisible. If only that was true.

"Well, it looks like we've got to get going. I have a toddler under that mess somewhere that is going to have to be given a bath." I sighed as I began the long process of standing up, the metal bench creaking beneath me.

"Okay! It was really nice talking to someone for a change. Maybe we can get together for dinner one night? Here's my number."

As I put her number into my phone, Claire sulked over to me. She knew that with me getting up it meant it was time to go.

"I'll be sure to give you a call later this week. It was nice meeting you!" And with that, I had made my first friend from the elite group of wives but unfortunately it was the outcast. That meant no other potential friends. Ah, well. Beggars can't be choosers.

"Snack?" Claire asked me as I strapped her into the stroller, cringing at the thought of having to clean it afterwards. I opened up the bag and realized that while we were talking I had subconsciously eaten almost everything. I grabbed the last bag of fruit snacks, placed them in Claire's lap, and made the much easier trip back home down the snake-like hill, smiling the entire way. Just before I made it around the first curve, one of the wives stopped me.

"I saw you talking to Anya." She spoke very blatantly with a serious undertone.

"Well, yeah," I replied. "No one else was speaking to her. I thought I would be a bit nicer and try to make her feel welcome."

"She's not welcome with us" the woman told me, her eyes glazed over in what seemed like fury.

"I don't see why she shouldn't be. She's very nice. Maybe if you oh-so-charming ladies would get over yourselves, you would see that not everything in a person has to do with who they know." I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks as I was nose to nose with this stuck-up woman who clearly didn't think I would be sticking up for Anya.

"Just watch your back," she told me. "You can't trust her."

As I stared back at her, looking puzzled, she turned swiftly on the ball of her foot and somewhat marched off, returning to her group of friends, whispering. I'm sure she was telling them about our small encounter. Almost simultaneously they looked at me, the same glazed look of fury covering their eyes.

Claire and I made it back home in time to get a quick sponge bath and an even quicker lunch of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches before her nap. We ate together in our not-so-chic living room that was made of thrown together cheap furniture that could suffice until we could buy our own. I wasn't scared of getting jelly smeared into the horrendously orange, floral printed couch cushions or juice being spilt. It was pointless with the condition of our things. We were waiting on Jacob's raise before buying, and only then would we get semi-new things. Some from garage sales, some from Goodwill, some from rent-to-own places. It was nice to think about. It made our future a bit brighter.

As Claire put the last bite of her sandwich into her mouth, she yawned and jerked about, stretching her limbs.

"Are you ready for your nap?" I asked her in a soothing, maternal tone that never quite seemed to leave me since the day I found out I was pregnant.

"Nap time."

Claire rubbed her eyes and laid her head onto my shoulder, burying her face into my neck. I felt her breathing begin to slow as I walked her down the hallway, into her bedroom, and placed her into her cozy, little toddler bed. I often wonder how she can sleep in it, with it being such a brightly colored pink. In fact, it was more like fuchsia under a black light at a techno rave.

As I turned to walk out of the door way and close the door, I heard a rustle in her bed.

"Mama?"

"What, baby?"

"Love you. Night."

"Love you too, Claire. Sleep tight."

It never manages to fill my heart with such a warmth of love as it does when Claire says she loves me. It's like a reminder that I'm doing things the right way with her and it makes me feel good, like I could accomplish anything.

I made my way back into the living room and cleaned up our places before I sat back in the computer chair. I stretched and popped, bending every which way, to try and get comfortable before finally realizing that comfort was just out of my reach. I reached down and hit the power button for the computer and continued the popping all throughout the start up music from Windows. I rapped my fingers on the desk as I waited for Internet Explorer to open up, and waited even longer for it to get to my E-mail server. I sat back with my arms extended to the keyboard, fingers resting in their appropriate typing places, and I began.

**Alice, **  
**You're probably right. There's no reason for me to flip out. It's all just hormones. I need this kid outta me. It's making me think crazy thoughts and have weird dreams, worse than eating cheese before going to bed. And I know I need to call, but half the time I don't get the time to have a decent conversation, and the other half of the time Mackenzie takes off with the phone and hides it. I do have to call, though. Mackenzie is a little TERROR. Okay, she's not that bad, but I can barely keep up with her!  
So, does Mr. Guy-At-The-Club have a name? Did you even remember his name? I bet you were too busy drooling over his abs, right? How about you call ME and spill it all? Or even sneak a picture if you run into him again. I'd like to see what he's all about.  
Esme's got a new boyfriend? Is paradise back? I sure hope so.  
So, I met this woman at the park today. She wasn't with the rest of the clique. She seems nice enough. I don't know, though. The rest of them..well, one of them, warned me that she wasn't welcome with them and told me I needed to watch my back. I don't get that, though. I just don't want her to feel alone, you know? And it's been so long since I've had a friend from around here. Ever since you got that job in Tennessee and left, it was like everyone else left, too. I want so badly to have a friend back here and I'm hoping I made one in her. I think I'm going to have her come over for dinner Saturday night. She's got two kids, a boy and a girl, and she's snarky. You might even like her.**

I'm sure you'll be getting back to me soon, so I'll cut this off quick. I've got high hopes for a picture soon. Get on that.

Bella 

With the click of the send button, I pushed the keyboard back and began getting up. I had a lot to do still. Laundry, some cleaning, and figuring out what dinner would be. I scratched my head, steadily got to my swollen feet, and began to finish what was left of the laundry. Thankful that Claire was taking a nap, I was finally able to push the thought of Jacob with another woman to how to make Anya more welcome. I knew I wanted to have her and her family for dinner, but I just didn't know how to break that to Jacob. He's not a very social person and hates meeting new people without much warning. Suddenly, I knew what I was making for dinner that night. Spaghetti with garlic bread. Jacob's favorite.

* * *

Again, props to **KristineMcCarty**. She's my freaking better half.


	5. Chapter 4

I own nothing. It's all from SM.

* * *

Jacob came strolling through the front door, tracking mud all over my freshly cleaned floors, just as I was waiting for my water to boil while folding a load of laundry. He stood in the kitchen for a moment, unaware that I was there, while he went through the never ending envelopes, all mainly full of bills. Still not noticing that I was there, he dropped the envelopes onto the counter in a huff and sauntered to the computer, a certain gleam in his eye that I couldn't really place.

"Jacob? Can you give me a hand here?" I managed to get the words out from behind a mound of folded up clothes of assorted sizes and colors, piled for what seemed to be miles high, in the too small, white, flimsy, plastic laundry basket that was halfway held onto, halfway performing a balancing act on my stomach.

Jacob jumped, lost his balance, and fell into the computer chair, becoming a spinning haze of grey and green. He stopped himself abruptly, put his hands to his head as if to stabilize himself, and looked over.

"Bella! I didn't see you there! Yeah, let me help you." He got up from his dazed and confused sitting position, only to fall back down into the partially comfortable chair. Instead of trying to rise again, he pulled the typical male move: used the chair's wheels. He spun, stopping where his back was facing me, and started kicking his feet onto the floor, pushing himself in my direction. He reached me, spun around, and grabbed the basket from my hands. Once the basket was balanced into his grip, he began kicking again, maneuvering through the hallway like he was steering an Indy 500 car, fully equipped with badly imitated screeching sounds.

At the sound of the cheers from the pretend finish line, I heard a new cheering. It was familiar and always happened to put a smile on my face as well as Jacob's.

"Daddy! Daddy! Come get me! DA-DEEEE!" I laughed at the last protest. Claire was awake and well aware that her daddy, the only man she ever cared to receive attention from at this point and time, was home and active. I heard Jacob slowly turn the knob to Claire's door, trying to seem like he was preparing a sneak attack. Shortly after I heard the creak of the door being completely opened, I heard a shriek of excitement that seemed to be getting louder and louder, like it was getting closer. Jacob had gotten a hold of Claire, flipped her over so he was carrying her forward by her feet, and appeared beside me in the kitchen, Claire laughing up a storm and Jacob smiling widely. This was the Jacob I loved, the one that I married, the one that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He's rarely like this anymore. I consistently wonder if that's my fault.

Jacob placed Claire down on the scuffed tile of the kitchen floor delicately as he sniffed the air. He was like a bloodhound, complete with a nose that was able to sniff out spaghetti within a 5 mile radius.

"Spaghetti tonight? With garlic bread?" His eyes sparkled with excitement, making him look like a teenage boy on the brink of losing his virginity to someone with the physical features resembling Claudia Schiffer or Angelina Jolie. I'd made the perfect choice for dinner.

"Yeah," I replied. "I figured we haven't had it in a while and you never object to spaghetti and garlic bread."

"My favorite. I can't wait." Jacob licked his lips and eyeballed the spaghetti sauce that was simmering on the stove. The look on his face made it very clear that he was so eager for dinner that he was willing to dive into the pot of spaghetti sauce alone.

"I'm starving! When will it be ready?" He looked at me with a hopeful expression. I knew he wasn't very patient, but when it came to spaghetti, patience was out the window.

"Soon," I told him. "The noodles have to finish being cooked. I want them to be al-freaking-dente when we eat them, not halfway cooked and then fished out because you couldn't wait."

Jacob hung his head in shame and guilt, but couldn't hide the mischievous grin on his face.

"Pasketti! Pasketti!" Claire finally realized what was being made for dinner. Surprise, surprise, it's one of her favorites, too. Half the reason is because she enjoys to decorate her body in it, I'm sure.

"In a few minutes, love," I reassured her with a soothing voice as I turned the heat off from the stovetop to stop the boiling water cooking the noodles and placed the loaf of garlic bread into the oven to bake it from it's frozen, out-of-the-box state. "Why don't you and daddy set the table?"

If there was one thing in the world Claire loved doing with Jacob, it was setting the table. Night after night, there were countless spoon wars, fork mountain building, and other random games that Jacob could come up with spontaneously. Quicker than a bolt of lightening, Claire dashed for the silverware drawer as Jacob pulled out the dinner plates.

As I began draining the noodles, I began hearing the clinking of silver. Looking to the table, I rolled my eyes. Tonight was a spoon war night, which was Jacob's way of trying to open Claire up to the world of Star Wars. Only I knew that Jacob secretly dreamed of his spoon being a light saber.

Once Jacob heard the water from the draining noodles begin to flow down the drain of our small, 50's style kitchen sink, he swiftly had Claire place the spoons in their designated places beside the plates, placed Mackenzie into her booster chair, and sat down in his own chair at the head of the table, anticipating the taste of his favorite spaghetti sauce mixed with meatballs, perfect noodles, and a bit of freshly grated parmesan cheese topping a piece of freshly baked, homemade garlic bread. I would bet money that he was drooling, but I couldn't blame him. The smell in the kitchen was intoxicating, like walking into a high class Italian restaurant that made authentic pastas from scratch, noodles and all. I wish I had the skill they have, rather than letting the aroma put a façade on about my cooking, making the claim that I really know what I'm doing when it comes to pasta.

As I pulled the garlic bread out of the oven and mixed the mouth-watering, aromatic spaghetti sauce into the noodles, my stomach began going insane. It was a straight portrayal of a scene in Alien. I groaned at the anticipation of having yet another spaghetti-with-garlic-bread-eater in the house. Must I REALLY be the black sheep? Apparently so.

Placing the pot of spaghetti in the middle of the table, I saw Jacob lick his lips vigorously and heard Claire slightly squeal in delight. Yes, it had been a long time since we've eaten spaghetti. The only time I can stomach it is when I'm pregnant, it seems. I spooned a heap of spaghetti onto Jacob's plate and before I could give him the second spoonful, he had already almost cleared his plate. I quickly gave him 5 more spoonfuls, hoping they would suffice for the meal and maybe even the next couple hours. I gave Claire two spoonfuls on top of her purple and white Dora plate, crossing my fingers that half of that would actually make it to her stomach and through her intestines. She promptly thanked me, picked up her fork, and dug in. Suddenly, my little girl changed into a carnivorous warrior, covered in red war paint. I smacked my forehead and let out a sigh. There was no preventing a mess with this sort of dinner.

I scooped a spoonful onto my plate before making my way back to the kitchen for the garlic bread. I placed the pot of spaghetti on the counter and reached for the plate of sliced, golden brown, calorie-filled bread when I glanced down at the bills on the counter.

The envelope for our cell phone bill stated it was to be "OPEN IMMEDIATELY" in bold, red letters. Silently, I placed the plate back onto the counter and tore the envelope open. As I unfolded the bill, I began scanning the words and numbers in search of something, though I was unaware of what at the time.

I was lucky I didn't have the plate in my hands when my eyes finally caught sight of the bill total. $498.52?! This wasn't right! Our bill monthly was never over $150 each month, and that was if we went over our minutes, over our texts, use the internet, and dial 411 a day all together. I began searching through the bill for answers, and all too quickly I received them. We had gone over our minutes by the hundreds and over our text messages by far too much for me to even fathom. It couldn't have been me. I rarely text anyone aside from Jacob and sometimes Alice, and I never call anyone aside from my family. This didn't add up.

I quickly folded the bill up and tucked it into my pocket. As I picked the plate of garlic bread back up, I composed myself the best I could. I didn't want to deal with that right now. Tonight, I had to convince Jacob that making new friends is not a bad thing.

When I finally made my way back to the table, placed the garlic bread down, and finally sat and began to eat, Jacob looked at me puzzled.

"Are you okay? That took so long, I really thought you got sucked down the garbage disposal." He began to run his eyes over me with concern, checking me head to toe. "Everything's fine with the baby, right?" His voice shook from the panic behind it. He always had this fear of one of his children not making it into the world, or losing me at childbirth, or losing me and the baby at childbirth.

"No, no, everything's fine," I reassured him, touching his arm tenderly with my hand. "I was just feeling a little light-headed, so had to eat a swiss roll really quick and I didn't want Claire to not finish her dinner because she saw me with it."

"Well, you better eat something more than just sugar." His voice showed authority, like he actually knew what he said would somehow be the final decision for everything. "I don't want my baby to be malnourished. I want it coming out pink, chunky, and with a penis."

I rolled my eyes. Jacob's one dream with his future offspring was to have a son. Someone he could introduce baseball to. Someone he could take hunting. Someone to share his name because, of course, the world desperately needs a Jacob Ephraim Black, Jr. to inhabit it. Jacob loves his little girl, don't get me wrong, but he is desperate for a boy. He's actually talking about, if we decide to have a third child, having his sperm spun and then having the male gene-carrying sperm inserted into me only. Yes, he's that determined.

"So, how was your day?" I figured I had to start the small talk with something about him. I hoped that it would make him drop his guards and be a bit more open.

"Oh, it was alright. There really wasn't much for us to do except for some paperwork and rearranging. We got new desks." The enthusiasm in his voice was fake in every bit. I could tell he was trying to end the small talk, focus on the spaghetti, and find out what bomb I may be dropping.

"Oh, really?" I pushed. "It's about time you got some new desks. Those other ones weren't going to last you guys much longer."

"Mmm." Jacob somewhat grunted to me with a mouth full of spaghetti. His plate was already almost cleared and he had polished off two slices of garlic bread, reaching for his third.

"Claire," Jacob began, "what did you and mommy do today?" He flashed a look at me and I know he saw the slight shift in my attitude. Whenever he wanted to know something, Hell if ANYONE ever wants to know what's going on, you always go to Claire. She loves any excuse to talk.

"Park!" She responded with the same enthusiasm from that morning. She flashed a gap-tooth grin to Jacob as she proceeded to babble. "Mama and Claire go park! Claire icky. Eww." Jacob looked at me for a decipher of Claire language. Some things, you can pick out really well. Others..well, you need mom.

"She's telling you that we went to the park today and she got dirty. Literally, Jacob, she was covered head to toe in dirt. It was HORRIBLE!" I explained.

Jacob chuckled at the thought of Claire covered in dirt, but I'm sure the real reason for his laughter was that he was trying to imagine me hunched over the bathtub, trying to give Claire a bath with my ever growing belly in the way.

"So what did you do this time while you were there? Read? Talk to your mom?" That's Jacob, always picking up on the random things that you don't think matter. I could tell him that I need to make it to a place by 5pm to pay a bill and he forgets, but what I do at the park while Claire plays, he remembers. It doesn't make sense.

"No, actually..um..well.." I began slowly, taking bites of my cold spaghetti and garlic bread to put awkward pauses in my explanation. "I didn't do any of those things. Actually, I talked to someone today."

Jacob's expression froze, making him look like a deer in the woods who has just caught scent of a predator.

"She seems really nice. Her name is Anya and she has two kids, one of them Claire's age. I might finally have a friend here. Isn't that great?"

"So that means I have to play nice with her husband, right?" Damn. Jacob already knew where this conversation was going. He glanced down at his plate and I knew that he now knew why spaghetti was made.

"Well, no you don't have to, but it would be nice. You're the only one with friends here and it would be nice to have a couple that we're both friends with." I looked at him with hope in my heart. Oh, how I wanted him to go along with this pleasantly!

"Fine," he said with a sigh. "I'll try. But I'm not making any promises. If I don't like this guy, I'm going to tell him."

"All I ask is that you try. Thank you." I couldn't have been any more happier. This was the chance for me to finally have a friend, finally have someone to visit with, someone to talk to, someone to go out with, it was all just out of arm's reach and I'm so close to getting a hold of it. The thought made me giddy.

As Jacob and I finished eating, we discussed a few other things to make small talk and to fill in awkward silences. New movie releases, what's on Pay-Per-View that month, what should be for dinner tomorrow night, how the weather will be tomorrow, how his family was doing, just random subjects. Enough to give us time to clear our plates.

Once we were finished and Claire had eaten some and decorated herself with the rest, I picked up the plates from the table and brought them in the kitchen to wash them. This was a nightly things I did so that Jacob and Claire could spend time together. Claire always looked forward to her daddy time. She rarely gets to see him that much, so these nights for her are precious. Jacob sometimes sits down with her to watch a short movie, other times he'll share a far too sugary dessert with her. It always ends in a race to the bathroom to take a bath, which is by far Claire's favorite part of the day.

As I began scrubbing the dishes, I heard a buzzing on the counter. I looked to my left and there laid Jacob's cell phone, lit up and vibrating towards the edge. I didn't want to disturb Jacob's time with Claire, so I rinsed my hands off, dried them, and picked up his phone. The number was unfamiliar and not programmed into his phone, so there wasn't a name that came up. Hoping it wasn't a telemarketer, I answered the phone.

"Hello?" There was a long, silenced pause. "Hello? Is anyone there?"

"Um, is…I think I have the wrong number. Bye." I was abruptly hung up on. By someone I didn't know. By just a voice. By a woman's voice.

Automatically, my mind began a tug of war game between the reminder of the suspicious E-mail I chalked up to be SPAM and the possibility of it being a wrong number. The woman did sound distraught and confused by me answering the phone, but if it was this girl that had E-mailed, is there a possibility that something IS going on behind my back? My gut was telling me to be suspicious, but my heart was telling me to trust Jacob.

"Jacob loves me and he would never hurt me like that," I told myself aloud. "The first priorities in his life are me, Claire, and this little kiddo in my stomach. He would never go and try to betray us like that. That's just so out of his comfort zone."

And really, I told myself privately, who would want him anyway? Alright, so he has this really nice hair, great teeth, looks super nice, but he's a flat out jackass when you first meet him. Only someone with extremely low standards would want to go after that…which makes me wonder, yet again, WHY I settled for him.

* * *

Reviews are amazing. :)  
Thanks KristineMcCarty.


	6. Chapter 5

All credit goes to SM. I own nothing.

* * *

When the dishes were finally washed, dried, and put away, I went into the living room to see Jacob and Claire sitting on the couch, sharing a box of Whoppers.

"Mama!" Claire greeted me with a chocolate-stained smile. I smiled back at the recognition I got from her. As I sat down next to them, she reached into the box, pulled out a Whopper, and proceeded to shove it into my mouth.

"Yummm," I told her partially with truth, mainly with sarcasm, especially since I knew this tasty treat came from the hand of my toddler, which was covered in slobber and the Lord only knows what else.

Soon the last of the Whoppers was eaten and everything fell silent, aside from the vibrantly colorful show that was on the television. I don't know what it is about children's shows, but they're always brightly colored and flashy. It's an epileptic's nightmare.

"Do you know what time it is?" I asked Claire in a playful voice. Claire's eyes widened and a wide grin filled the bottom half of her face.

"BAF TIME?!" She almost shouted in between sliding herself off the couch, trying to undress herself at the same time.

Jacob stood up from the couch, stretched every which way, and popped his back, just by arching it, all the way down. He yawned loudly, causing Claire and me to yawn with him. All the while Jacob was doing this, Claire stood in the empty, open entryway that leads down the hallway and to the bathroom, waiting impatiently. After a few seconds, which must've felt like an eternity to her, Claire came running back to Jacob and me and attacked Jacob's legs.

"Daddy," she said, quite seriously, "baf time. Now." Jacob and I laughed loudly at Claire's attitude as she waited impatiently for Jacob to finish and to get her into the bathtub.

Once Jacob was finished popping in some ways that seem unnatural, he took Claire's hand and had her lead him to the bathroom, where he got her undressed and into the tub.

Claire loves bath time and her sponge bath she had earlier just didn't suffice, for both her love of the bath and my love of her being completely clean. Besides, she still had a red tint to her skin. She needed a bath.

The water stopped running from the faucet and I could hear Claire as soon as she made contact with the few inches that filled the bath tub. Loud, excited shrieks filled the house as Claire began splashing loudly, apparently soaking Jacob, who was laughing and shouting almost as much as Claire. Throughout the entire duration of the bath, the house was filled with the squeaking of a rubber duck, the splashing of the waves created by Hurricane Claire, and the random squealing coming from Claire's excitement. The entire time, I stayed sitting on the couch, relaxing. Well, relaxing as well as you can when you sit on the edge of the couch, in a position you can get up easily from. I wasn't doing another Olympic triathlon tonight. One every morning is enough for me.

"Bye-bye, baftub!" There it was, the cue that Claire's bath was over. I could hear her trying to push the water to the drain, only causing more waves to crash. Finally, the water had emptied completely with a loud gurgle. Jacob took Claire into her bedroom, got her dressed, and put her in bed. I went to the master bedroom and made the bed so that we could sleep comfortably, but before I could climb into bed, there was one more think I had to do. I had to see if Alice got back to me.

I made my way back to the computer, stopping to kiss Jacob goodnight on my way. I told him I wouldn't be too long, so I really needed to make this quick. I had my fingers crossed that Alice had responded so I wouldn't wait around.

The blue light from the computer screen was blinding in the dark and the cheap computer chair hurt my back, but I kept reminding myself that I'd only be there a moment. Once the computer was completely booted up, I once again opened Internet Explorer and went to our E-mail server to input our information.

150 pop-up ads later, I was finally seeing our inbox. I didn't even bother fishing through the SPAM this time, I wanted to see if Alice had responded. After a search through the penis enlargement ads and the big, busty women in our area, I finally found Alice's response. I couldn't wait. This one was bound to be good. I opened it at once and began reading.

**Bella,  
Mom's boyfriend is really nice. His name is Carlisle and they're a total match made in Heaven. He's mom's exact opposite, but they play off each other so well. Mom definitely dominates the conversations and he lets her. You can definitely tell that they belong together. Hell, I love him, too. He tries winning me over on a daily basis with random little things he picks up for me because he "saw it and thought of me." Hell, it's free. I'll take it. Claire sounds like an absolute RIOT! I can't wait to come and visit you guys and see her. I wonder if she remembers me. I mean, I doubt she does, but I can hold out some hope that she's a complete genius with a photographic memory. At least let me be hopeful!  
I'm glad you finally met someone. I know that everyone left and that really sucks for you. I hate that you're there all alone. I SO want to be there with you, or you come out here with me If only it were that simple, right? Could you imagine the destruction we could do here in Tennessee?! We could go to Gatlinburg, get shit faced, and just paint the town red! And the best part? We can be whoever we want to be! It's not like we're just in the small town of Whytte, anymore. People all over don't know us here. SOO MUCH TROUBLE! And I had to save the best for last. My Greek God. Oh my God, words cannot even DESCRIBE him, but I'll try. He's at least 6' with GORGEOUS olive toned skin. And a 6-pack is NOT good enough for this boy. Oh no. We're talking 8-pack, COMPLETELY cut and tone. He's got SUCH a tight ass, the kind you just want to wrap your hands around and squeeze. GORGEOUS curly, black hair that just miss touching his shoulders and his eyes! OH DEAR GOD HIS EYES! He's got those golden brown, bedroom eyes without even trying to make them. I'm getting all hot and bothered just talking about him. Unfortunately, I don't have a picture. Instead, I got a one-night stand…Don't hate. Okay, no more about that until next time because I highly doubt you really want any details about the sex (which was awesome, by the way, in one of the bathroom stalls in the VIP section of this one really amazing club out here) and, honestly, I don't even know his name.  
I'll try giving you a phone call soon.**

Alice

I sat there, staring at the computer screen, for a good 5 minutes before realizing that that E-mail was far too much for me to grasp being as exhausted as I was. So, instead of just blowing it off, trying to get it all into my head, or trying to respond, I did what any smart person would do: I jotted down notes on post-its and stuck them to the computer screen to remind myself of the main points I wanted to write her back about.

I soon realized just how tired I was, but before actually going to bed, I jotted down one more note on a post-it and stuck it to the refrigerator on my way back through the house and to the bedroom.

Call Anya for dinner.

* * *

I know, this is short, but with lovely help from KristineMcCarty, it's just what needed to happen. Word? Word.  
Reviews, ftw please.


	7. Chapter 6

I own none of these characters. They all come from the works of Stephenie Meyer. Don't sue my pants off. Please trust me, you don't want to see me with my pants off. The nightmares...*shudders*

* * *

I woke the next morning with a smile on my face. I had the potential of a friend right within my grasp. I could feel the comfort at the idea of company throughout my body like a warm, fleece blanket on a cold, bitter, winter day. My body could sense the change, too. Finally relaxed, it was easier to get out of bed, easier to keep up with Claire, all around easier to live.

I greeted the sun that was shining its rays through my window with a grin instead of my normal scowl full of hatred. I had slept great that night, for the first night in months. I felt refreshed, rejuvenated, and ready to handle anything

After Claire and I fulfilled our breakfast routine, I began to tackle the first task I had to handle: responding to Alice's E-mail. I didn't know how exactly to go about this. Alice had thrown a lot more detail into her E-mail this time around compared to most of her other E-mails that clearly show her ADD. This would be challenging. I began going off of all the yellow post-its that were stuck around the computer's monitor and started typing away.

**Alice,  
May I begin this by saying WHAT in the world was up with that?! How long did it take for you to type all that out? Almost all day?! You can't sit down long enough to ever, EVER add that much detail! Okay, got that out of my system.  
YOU DIDN'T GET HIS NAME?! What kind of whore are you?! I kid, I kid. One night stands are fun. You get to have your cake and eat it too..sometimes with a little extra, like Chlamydia? I totally suggest that you get checked out because even thought he may have looked like a Greek God, he might have something funky going on down there. Gods like to give gifts. This is the gift that keeps on giving. At least he sounds amazingly hot in every way possible. If I wasn't a married woman…yes, that was me swooning.  
I'm glad everything is going great with Esme. She deserves a good guy. I'm sure she really happy with him and I really hope this is THE one for her. She deserves it.  
I'm holding you to that phone call. By the time that comes, I'll probably have a TON to tell you about. Be ready for that one.**

Bella

I sighed. That was one very short E-mail, but it sure took me long enough to wrap my head around all the details about this mysterious Greek God. At the picture of him in my head, I blushed slightly. My imagination couldn't be as accurate as I would assume, but I was pleased with it either way. However, I felt guilty picturing this man. I was a married mother of soon-to-be two children. I shouldn't be having these thoughts. I love my husband and I'm with him forever. I don't need physical attributes to make me happy. I just need Jacob, Claire, and this new bundle of joy.

I shut down the computer before going back to Claire, who should be close to finishing her movie right now. This was a huge hassle. I hated always having to shut it down and restart it, hearing that horrible Windows tune play. That stupid thing got stuck in my head throughout the day and I'd find myself humming it, whistling it, tapping it, just in any way, shape, or form letting it come out. I peeled off all the post-its from the monitor and threw them out. All except one. I looked at the one post-it left with the black sharpie writing screaming at me.

Call Anya for dinner.

I knew I had to get it done, I wanted a friend badly, but I'm horrible when it comes to phone conversations. My palms get sweaty, my heart races, my breath becomes short, and I can barely get words out. I needed this to be very nonchalant sounding. As I sat down on the couch to try and think of something, Claire threw herself at my legs for my attention.

"Mama. Okay?" She was always quite intuitive, even at her young age. It was something bittersweet. She was always a very comforting child, putting her hand on your shoulder to calm you, giving you hugs, it was very sweet. Unfortunately, she was quick to pick up on hostile feelings, tension, sadness, the things you don't want someone that age to pick up on. She carries those feelings with her, which is far too much of a weight for a child to bear.

"Yes, sweetheart, mama's okay." I tried to reassure her with as much calm in my voice as possible, but that was hard while I was anticipating making this phone call to a, let's admit it, complete stranger. What if she turned out to be some physco? What if she turned into a kleptomaniac? What was I getting my family into?!

"Mama," Claire said to get my attention again. "It okay, mama." She patted my knee and looked at me with her gorgeous, huge, brown eyes. I melted into a smile instantly.

"You're right, Claire. It's okay. Mama has to go talk on the phone really quick. Do you want to watch something on TV or do you want to go play in your room with your toys?"

"I go play," Claire replied almost as quickly as she turned on the balls of her feet and ran to her room. It's the simple things that make her happy.

I picked the phone up from the counter it was sitting on and put it back down. The screen's light seemed to glare at me, screaming that it was charged and ready for me to call, to get on with it already. I kept picking up the phone, only to put it back down. This was a fight that went on for a good 5 minutes.

Finally, I remembered myself being lonely for so long in this uptight neighborhood and realized that I desperately needed this. Not just for me to be happy, but so that I'd be happy for my family.

I picked up the phone again, but this time I grazed my fingers over the number pad. I went through my phonebook slowly until Anya's name was highlighted. I hit the illuminated, green button on the left and waited for the screen to say it was connected. I placed the phone beside my ear and waited.

_Ring._

Ring.  
  
"Hello?" The voice was a mere whisper. I could vaguely put her face to it, in the midst of my racing mind.

"Hi..um, Anya? This is Bella. We met at the park? I was the one who's daughter was covered in dirt." My voice sounded so foreign, I didn't even recognize it. It was like I knew I was speaking, but it just wasn't me.

"Oh! Hi, Bella! I'm glad you called! I was wondering if you wanted to get together and have a play date for the kids." Anya suddenly sounded cheery, like she had just thrown down 5 cups of Folgers with a shot of tequila in each of them.

"Really?" I responded. "I was going to see if you'd like to come over with the kids, and your husband of course, and have dinner with me, Claire, and my husband, Jacob, on Saturday."

"Oh, that sounds great! Do you need me to bring anything?" She sounded as enthused as I was feeling. To finally have someone to talk to, to do things with, this was all to much! My happiness began slowly bubbling over.

"Oh, nothing!" My voice reflected the brook of giggles that was streaming from my brain throughout my body, which sent tingles down my spine. "You don't have to worry about that. I have it all covered. Just come around, oh, 6pm. You can come at 5pm if you just want to let the kids play and have some time for us to talk and get to know each other while I'm getting dinner all ready." Seriously, I had to cool it down. I was getting far too giddy.

"That sounds great! We'll see you then!" She sounded excited, but calm.

"Okay! See you then! Bye!" I had a slight knotted feeling in my stomach as I pushed the red, lit up button on the phone. It was like my conscience was trying to tell me something, but I was never very good with listening to that conscience thing. I pushed the feeling aside and replaced it with something better.

I had a friend. Okay, I was close to having a friend. The space between my fingertips and that idea had grown significantly smaller. I felt good. I felt great. I felt like I could conquer the world. Well, maybe that's pushing it, but I felt amazing. It was like the void that was made in my life was beginning to fill. The missing piece of the puzzle had finally been found.

Claire came over to me with a huge grin on my face. She picked up on the cheerful mood I was finally in and it seemed like with the tension gone she could move more freely. I loved it when I saw how free she was when I was feeling better.

"Mama! Play!" She threw a ball and a small stuffed dog into my lap. "Puppy! Bawl! Play!" She gave me a gap-toothed grin that anyone would fall in love with. I obliged almost immediately, throwing the ball across the room and then tossing the puppy beside the ball so that it looked like it was playing fetch. Claire kept giggling her bubbly laugh that was so contagious, it could probably be the one thing to bring world peace.

All while I played Claire, which lasted for about an hour and consisted of throwing the ball and puppy across the room, I contemplated all the details of this dinner and how to make it perfect. I analyzed every little thing possible. It needed to be the best, the crème de la crème. The food, the décor, the talking…oh dear Lord, PLEASE let the talking go well. Jacob isn't the best on conversation and small talk.

After the hour of playing with Claire, she became exhausted and my arms couldn't handle anything else. I put her down for a nap and began writing out everything for the dinner.

I decided that dinner shouldn't be something extraordinary, but something great nonetheless. Probably some sort of pasta dish, because anyone can feign that they know what they're doing with a pasta dish. I was also holding out that the pasta dish would put Jacob at ease. I'd probably go for a fettuccini alfredo, baked ziti, or some chicken pesto. I'd bake some fresh garlic bread, make a garden salad instead of buying it in the bag at Wal-Mart like usual, and serve some wine that could bring out the flavors of the dinner.

Then I remembered something.

There would be three young children sitting at the table to eat dinner with us. It has to be something that they would it and I'm not going to serve wine in front of the children. And then, of course, with me being pregnant I couldn't drink the wine. I probably wouldn't be able to stomach the smell, either.

Okay, scratch that idea. I'd go for a pasta, but something much simpler. Yes, it would be fettuccini alfredo. I'd have some garlic bread, but also some bread with just butter for the kids. The salads would be kept to a minimum, just lettuce, carrots, croutons, and some dressing. I'd get a few bottles of different dressings, even. Instead of wine, we would just stick with some sodas, water, and juice. That sounds impressive.

Now, dessert. A nice dinner like this needs a dessert, especially with children involved. I'm going to keep the sugar to a minimum. We don't need kids bouncing off the walls that late, especially if I'm trying to get a friend. This is tough.

_Ah, screw it_, I thought to myself. I'd just make a simple pineapple upside down cake and leave it at that.

Now that my meal was all planned out, there was one thing left I had to do. Shopping.

* * *

Again, reviews are appreciated. It's nice to know that people are actually reading my meaningless ramblings, lol.  
And props to **KristineMcCarty**. She's pretty much the shit. ;)


	8. Chapter 7

I own none of the characters or Twilight. That's all Stephenie Meyer.

* * *

  
Claire woke up just fifteen minutes before Jacob made it home. In that fifteen minutes, I changed Claire's diaper and make sure she was in a clean outfit, I made sure I was decent to go out, and then sat and waited in the living room. When Jacob walked through the door, he looked at me with a puzzled expression.

"Is dinner already finished?" He asked, smelling the air for any sort of aroma. }

"No. I need to go grocery shopping, so I figured we could just eat at McDonalds. Claire would really love that." She really would. It was her favorite place. She loved the French fries and going into the play place.

"Oh. Well, okay. Just let me go get changed." Jacob still seemed a bit shocked that I hadn't made a meal for him. He could get over it. The rest of today would be tough, though. I had a feeling he was in a bad mood over something, and it wasn't just that I hadn't made him dinner.

The ride in our Ford Escape was silent for once. We could even hear the radios from the surrounding vehicles piercing through the walls of ours with such ferocity that I seemed to jump with the bass. The only sound in the car was Claire in the backseat, who was screeching that she wanted a French fry. We couldn't get to McDonald's soon enough.

After we paid for our food, I went to get our drinks from the soda fountain. I went and sat down with Claire in the play place area with our drinks so she could play while we waited for Jacob to bring the food. I tried to find a nice table, but most of the tables looked as if they hadn't been cleaned in ages. Instead, I chose to sit at a booth. The tables were cleaned, but the seats were rather torn. I found the one with the fewest holes and tears, and sat.

I pulled off Claire's pink sneakers and placed them beside me, the blinking lights from the heel reflecting from the window in place of a wall.

"Okay, Clairebear. You can go play for a little bit until daddy gets back here with our food." I told her. Her face lit up automatically.

"PLAY!" Claire exclaimed as she ran to the plastic, fluorescent, multi-colored tubes.

Jacob found us a few moments later, tray of food in one hand, cell phone in the other.

"What's going on?" I asked him, with sincere concern in my voice. I figured he was having a bad day at work and it was just getting carried onto him as he was home.

"Oh. Nothing. Really, it's nothing." Jacob spoke as if I had put myself into a situation I shouldn't have. Damn my curiosity for making me ask. He put his phone on the table and began tearing into his double cheeseburger.

I called Claire from the play place and she came to sit next to me. After using her hand sanitizer, she dug into her kid's meal of chicken nuggets, French fries, Hi-C fruit punch, and her toy. In those few moments of playing, she had worked up quite the appetite. I always wondered how someone so small could contain so much food.

_Buzz!_

Buzz!

There went Jacob's phone again, vibrating. I reached for it to see who it was, but he snatched the phone up before my hand even made it halfway across the table. He began pressing keys, responding to his text message, muttering under his breath the entire time.

"So, how was your day?" I asked with shyness in my voice. It wasn't like Jacob to be in this state of mind, so frustrated and so filled with anger. This was way out of his nature, especially with me. Despite the growing apart we had done, he was still always so respectful of me and my feelings.

"Fine," was all he snapped back at me with hostility in his words, engulfed in the text message conversation he was having. With his cheeseburger in one hand and his phone in the other, he sat without making eye contact. Again and again, his phone would vibrate, and again and again he would respond without so much as motioning to me.

In the silence, I began to eat my chicken nuggets. It wasn't so much eat as it was picking at. I had lost my appetite. Nothing sounded appealing anymore, not with Jacob acting this way toward me.

Claire finished quickly and anxiously. She looked at me as she swallowed her last bite and I nodded back to her, giving her the okay to go and play once again. She leapt from the bench and tore off into the tunnels.

With Claire off playing in the play place after quickly finishing her kid's meal and Jacob, completely unaware of my existence, sitting there with his phone, I sat feeling as alone as anyone could. Physically, I was surrounded by people of all ages and race. Mentally, I was by myself in a dark room, huddled in a corner, feeling sorry for myself. I couldn't have that. I had to think of something to raise my spirits.

Anya and her family would be coming to dinner in just 3 days. I was going to have a friend here once again. That in itself was enough to bring a small smile to my lips.

When I had finally been able to stomach eating two chicken nuggets from my 10-piece meal, I was done. I stood up, collected all our trash from the table, put it onto the tray, and took it to the trash. When I was making my way back, Jacob was looking at his newest received text message. I slowed my pace, glancing at the text message.

**…could play it off well. **

That was all I could make out of it before Jacob closed his phone. I sat back down at the booth and stared at my hands, which were folded on the cold, plastic table.

"Are you about to go?" Jacob asked with sudden impatience in his voice. His eyes were piercing, and looked almost red with fury.

"Um, just another five minutes," I told him. "Claire really enjoys playing here. She doesn't get to do this often."

"Fine," Jacob snapped back again. "I'll go wait in the car." He got up in a rush, turned swiftly, and walked out the door. I rubbed my eyes after he left, at the sudden stinging they began doing. It wasn't until then that I realized the stinging was tears forming.

"Claire!" My broken voice called for her in somewhat of a soft-spoken sound. "It's time to go!"

"Aw, mama!" Claire was coming down the huge, spiral, lime green slide. As she made her way to the opening leading outside of the play place, her hair stood on end. The static electricity was running through her fiercely. I laughed at the sight.

"C'mon, kiddo. Let's get your shoes on." I had finally gotten my regular voice back and no longer did I sound like I was on the verge of a breakdown.

Claire sulked over to me and obliged as I pulled her into my lap and slipped her shoes back on. She stood on the ground first, looking longingly at the play place as I tried to make my way up. Unfortunately on that way up, I became lodged between the immobile table and the bench. With grunting force, I finally slid out of the bench and took hold of Claire's hand. We began our walk into the parking lot in search of our car.

After what seemed like an eternity, I caught sight of Jacob. His face was red and his ear was pressed up against his phone. His lips moved feverously and his voice was so loud I could almost decode what he was speaking, but I had to keep my attention to Claire to make sure she didn't run throughout the parking lot dangerously. This was definitely not normal for Jacob, who is usually so tranquil and serene.

The most unusual about this scenario, though, is the place the car was parked. It had been moved from its place close to the door. It was now back in the near the shrubbery and under the camouflage from the shade of the tall oak trees.

As Claire and I inched closer to our car, I heard some of Jacob's shouting.

"NO. I'm NOT going to let that happen. Just listen to me, okay?! Everything will work out for the best, I promise. You DON'T have to bring that up! Everything will be fine! Don't even let that question be spoken from your lips. You'll turn everything into a huge mess. Just keep your mouth shut!" Jacob glanced in the rear view mirror and saw Claire and me walking to him. He quickly whispered something into the receiver end of his phone and shut it. This was not just something I could shrug off.

"Jacob?" I said as I began strapping Claire into her booster seat. "What was that all about? I've never seen you this worked up or angry about anything in the time we've been together. You can talk to me, you know. I'm your wife. It's what I'm here for."

Jacob's eyes looked like they were slowly welling up with tears at the last sentence I spoke. Something was troubling him, but I had no idea what it was and he was giving me nothing to work with. I was starting to get frustrated with this whole thing.

I began trying to climb into the car, my short and stubby legs unable to really support me and my belly in the awkward positioning I had to do to maneuver myself up and in. Jacob reached his hand out for me and helped me up, as gentle as any man could ever be.

"Bella, it's really nothing. Just some things I have to get worked out on my own. I promise." His eyes showed meaning behind them, strong and fierce. I'd never seen that sort of meaning in his eyes since the day he married me. It was like an overpowering force to me, and quickly my anger and frustration subsided.

"Okay. Whatever you say." I let my lips show a small smile. It was funny how one strong look from Jacob could still make me weak at the knees and make me get butterflies in my stomach. Yes, we had grown apart, but I hadn't felt this close to him in a long time.

"So," he began, "where do you want to do the grocery shopping?" His mood began to lift. I liked to imagine that it was me showing concern that helped that, only to put myself at ease.

"Let's just go to Wal-Mart. Everything's there." It's true. I'm a rehab-needing, hardcore Wal-Mart junkie. It's always my one stop shop.

After finding a parking spot in the hodgepodge of vehicles that the parking lot was, we finally made our way inside. We grabbed a shopping cart, strapped Claire into the front seat, and were on our way.

As we began walking through the produce, Jacob took my arm and wrapped it around his. Oh, how I'd missed this! The closeness, the intimacy, the love. It was like we were one again. I didn't want to let it go.

"Did you need any of this?" Jacob had broken up my happiness with a question. I sighed and looked up at what he was holding. A bag of salad.

"No," I said, rolling my eyes. "I'm not taking the easy way out this time. I'm actually chopping the lettuce and all the other vegetables and making it myself, thank you very much."

"Sheesh, okay." Jacob put the salad down and held his hands up in a defensive manor. I could tell he was joking by the sarcasm plastered all over his face, not to mention his cheesy, toothy grin.

The rest of our shopping trip went along like that. We were happy again. The happy Jacob and Bella that everyone loved. We were in the honeymoon phase again and I loved every minute about it. I barely even noticed when Claire grabbed a handful of Kool-Aid packets from the shelf and threw them into the shopping cart. I didn't care. I was on Cloud 9 in sheer ecstasy. Nothing could bring me down from this.

By the time we got home, it was Claire's bed time. Jacob swiftly put her in bed and the feeling of ecstasy continued on. Apparently, Jacob was feeling it as much as me, if not more. He returned to the living room where I was at, swooped me off my feet, and ran me to the bedroom, kissing me passionately every step of the way.

The feel of his fingertips over my body felt like an electric current. It had been so long since we had this kind of closeness, this kind of energy, this kind of passion. He kissed me ever so softly, his lips delicately on mine. He slowly removed my clothes and held me close to him. I never want this to end, I thought as I let myself drift into the sheer bliss of his touch.

* * *

Props to **KristineMcCarty**. She's pretty much my favorite.  
Reviews and shaith? Those are pretty amazing. :)


	9. Chapter 8

I do not own Twilight or its characters. That's all Stephenie Meyer.  
This is a short chapter. I apologize.

* * *

  
I woke the next morning to the sun shining through our window and a smile on my face. I rolled over and Jacob was gone. I looked at the clock and the digital, red numbers said 9:30am. I sighed. He had already left for work. In his place, however, was a note from him…

**My dearest Bella,  
Last night was amazingly mind-blowing. I can't stop  
thinking about it. Before I left for work, I kissed your  
lips hoping that you would still feel it when you woke  
up. I hope you did.  
You are the love of my life. Please don't ever let any  
problem we may have allow you to forget that. You  
mean the world to me.  
Yours,  
Jacob **

A tear slowly made its way down my cheek. Jacob used to tell me these things all the time, when we were in our happy phase. It had to be a year or more since I heard those words…okay, saw those words technically.

I brought my hand to my lips, remembering the passion in every kiss he had given me. I really could almost feel his lips on mine again, and I blushed at remembering all the details from the night before.

Claire hadn't woken up yet, she's not a morning person, so I took this opportunity to get on the computer and see if Alice had written me back yet.

I made myself a cup of hot tea and headed to the computer. Strangely enough, it was already on and our E-mail page was already opened. I suppose Jacob checked it before he left for work.

_That MUST be what he's been freaking out about!, _I thought to myself. _He's expecting a really important E-mail from someone and it hasn't come yet. He needs that E-mail for something. I bet that's what it is.  
_  
I began going through the inbox looking and, sure enough, there was Alice. I clicked it open and began to read. I had a feeling some sort of sarcastic comment would be included. I couldn't wait.

**Bella,  
Okay, listen. Greek Gods DON'T have STDs! It's not possible! That's why they're GODs! DUH! And I'm NOT a whore. Just so you know that. And that's it. Yes. That's all I have to say to you right now. Calling me a whore. Bitch. I love you.**

Alice

I couldn't stop laughing. I felt like I had to hold my belly so that the baby wouldn't just fall out because of how bad I was shaking. This was SO Alice. I missed her something fierce. I couldn't wait until she came to visit. It was hard not having a best friend around.

The next couple days went by in a blur. It was the same old routine. The only change was my preparation for Saturday. It couldn't come quick enough. I cleaned the house top to bottom as thorough as possible. Jacob and I kept the same closeness and never before had I felt so wanted. It was nice.

Saturday finally came and I was bouncing off the walls of the house with excitement. Claire helped Jacob clean up the toys, and by clean I mean throw them around and "try" to aim at the toy box. |

I stayed in the kitchen, preparing the dinner. The smile couldn't be wiped off my face for anything. I was so anxious to see Anya and meet her family. Jacob seemed somewhat put-off, but I couldn't be bothered to ask why.

I finally had the garlic bread in the oven, the fettuccini noodles boiling on the stove, the alfredo sauce simmering on the stove beside the noodles, and tossing the salad all at the same time. I was trying to talk myself down when…

_DING-DONG! _

The doorbell made me as giddy as a toddler who was forced to sit for hours on end. I raced to the door and opened it, a large smile on my face.

Again, major shoutoutskies to **KristineMcCarty**, who is pretty much the greatest thing since sliced bread.  
Reviews and such are great.

* * *


	10. Chapter 9

Once again, I don't own the characters. They belong to SM.

* * *

I walked to the door with thrill rushing through my veins. My heart was racing and I could almost swear there was beads of sweat on my forehead. My feet couldn't move quick enough as I boosted my walk to a power walk. After what felt like an eternity, the cool feeling of round metal was in my palm as I grabbed hold of the doorknob and turned it.

"Hi! Welcome! Come on in!" I greeted to Anya and her family. At first sight of her family, I was relieved. They looked like us, normal. There wasn't any sign of being a loon or serial killer. They were conventional.

"Hi, Bella!" Anya greeted with a cheery voice. She breezed past me in her brightly colored floral print sundress, her small family close behind. Her smile was as big as mine was. The smile put me at ease.

"Of course you know the kids, Kate and Garrett." She continued. How could I forget them? The vividly blonde hair, piercing blue eyes, pout-shaped lips, small nose, I couldn't forget it. Then again, I couldn't lie to myself either. Neither held a candle to Claire.

"And this," she said as she put her arm around the tall, handsome man standing next to her, "is my husband, Edward." I could've picked him out to be the father of their children in a heartbeat. They were literally the spitting image of him. He wasn't all that much, either. Sure, he looked about 6' tall, had golden locks of hair, and eyes as blue as the ocean, but something about him just didn't appeal to me. Maybe it was the way his red polo he wore with the khakis just didn't work for his pale color. He definitely needed some sun.

I held out my hand to shake his, and at the touch of our fingertips against eachother, an electric current broke throughout both of our bodies, igniting fires neither of us could comprehend. We both sat for what seemed like an eternity, confused in the electric jolt.

"I can see why you get the question about your kids a lot," I joked to her, trying to get the conversation back on track. While she laughed, I took the time to analyze her features. She was right, though. The kids have nothing from her. Perhaps it was a good thing. Anya wasn't exactly the most attractive person. She had some great attributes that I didn't have, mainly a butt and breasts. However, her dark brown hair didn't suit her shade of olive skin, which was covered in freckles. Her brown eyes looked more like beads, they were small and sinister-looking. Her lips were thin and faint and her nose reminded me of Michael Jackson. However, out of all that, I couldn't take my eyes off of her teeth. The very least she could've done was brush them, though that wouldn't help straighten them in any way, shape, or form. Regardless of physical features, though, this was my potentially new friend. I needed to keep it that way.

"I wasn't kidding, but I promise they're mine!" She joked back. She poked an uncomfortable looking Edward to get him to release a chuckle. It sounded forced, but at least he made a sound.

"This," I began as I led them into the living room, "is my husband, Jacob." As soon as Jacob and Anya locked eyes, a mass of emotions filled the air. Tension, rage, frustration, sorrow, it could all be felt at once. It was overwhelming, like someone sitting on your chest while you were trying to breathe.

"Jacob," I said, trying to break the obviously bad atmosphere, "this is Anya, Edward, Kate, and Garrett. Everyone, this is Claire." The gaze between Jacob and Anya broke and the atmosphere lifted. It was easier to breathe, easier to speak, easier to feel a bit more comfortable. Finally, I could heave a sigh of relief that things began to look a bit smoother for the night.

I sent the kids into the spare bedroom, soon to be the nursery but for now holding out as a play room, left Edward in the living room with Jacob, who was watching a baseball game, and took Anya into the kitchen with me so I could make the finishing touches on dinner. I drained the noodles, pulled out the garlic bread, and began mixing the alfredo sauce with the noodles before Anya spoke.

"Your house is amazing! Far better than ours." Anya talked while spinning circles, looking around in every direction. Her inspecting was interrupted by a howl from the living room.

"That was safe!"

"He didn't touch the base!"

"I bet you're one of those people that tries to triple stamp a double stamp, too!"

"What are you talking about?!"

"Dumb and Dumber!"

"Oh."

Anya and I looked at each other and laughed. Jacob was notorious for his yelling at the television during game time, but I'd never heard him yelling with anyone else. I'm sure it was normal, but I could almost make out real resentment in his voice. I asked Anya to get the guys and the kids as I set the table for us to eat. We all sat, served ourselves, and began conversation.

"So, Edward," I initiated, "where do you work? Anya said you have a pretty hectic schedule." I really tried to make it seem like I was interested, but you could clearly tell that it was a painstaking attempt at small talk, just one step above talking about the weather.

"Oh," replied Edward as I caught him off guard. "I work on a lot of boats on the river. I'm gone a lot of the time. It sucks, but the pay is good." He paused to take a bite of his dinner. "This is really good pasta. Two thumbs up, even."

"He's not one for two thumbs. Usually he sticks to one." Anya explained. I was grateful that she did.

"Jacob works on a lot of airplanes, checking the breaks and such. He tried to be the person who shot chickens at the window, but apparently that was full." That got a laugh, but it was the truth. Jacob tried the easiest route first, but when that didn't work out he found a well-paying job and took that.

"So, is Jacob gone a lot, too?" Anya asked me with a twinge of something in her voice that I couldn't quite put my finger on. Her eyes seemed to shift back and forth between me and Jacob many times, but I figured she was still trying to get comfortable in the surroundings.

"Yeah," I replied. "You would think that they'd keep him stationary most of the time, but he does a lot of business trips and long days. It really cuts down our time as a family." I looked at Jacob. He locked eyes with me momentarily before dropping them to his plate as he filled his mouth with colossal bites of food.

"Oh?" Anya responded, seeming somewhat curious. "That must be hard on you guys. How do you keep it going through all of that? I know we've had some rough times. Actually, we were just on the brink of divorce not to long ago. How do you..well..do it? Isn't there some sort of trust issue there? Any sort of doubts between each other?" As she was speaking, she looked into my eyes with a cold, piercing stare. Something about it seemed so evil, but I couldn't place my finger on it.

"I trust Jacob with my life. I have no reason to doubt him. I never will. He has free reign to do what he pleases, but he knows the boundaries and I trust him to keep his vows to me. It's that simple." My reply seemed so bland and textbook. I couldn't barely get anything but that out with Anya looking at me the way she was. I shifted my eyes from her stare to my food, realizing that I barely touched it since we had began talking.

I began eating small bites, but I could feel Anya's eyes bore into my head. The feeling put knots in my stomach, but I kept trying to eat. Every now and then, I'd glance at the children for a smile. They would eat, alright, but not without putting the noodles on top of their heads. Every now and then, they looked like dreadlocks. Either way, they were very content with eating on their own, which just made it even harder for me to pay attention to them without looking like I was trying to keep out of an awkward conversation.

"Jacob? You're not talking much. What's wrong?" I asked in a state of confusion. I really didn't get it. Usually, Jacob would at least attempt some small talk to humor me. Tonight, he was being uncomfortably silent at dinner.

"Oh, it's nothing," he replied. "I've got a ton of stuff going on with work. It's been pretty hectic lately. They're talking about another business trip and I'm trying to make sure I don't have to go. I need to be here to help you get ready for the new baby."

Jacob's voice filled my ears like velvet, once again reminding me how lucky I was to have a husband as caring as he. Though we hit a huge rut, he was still there somewhere, the man I married.

"Jacob, if you have to go then you have to go. It's just part of the job description." I know my voice was understanding, but it always tore me apart inside when I knew he had to leave. Anya was right. It was hard. It wasn't so much the trust part, but the rules. Jacob insisted that I stayed at home because of the men that lived around us. He always told me that he trusted me, but not them. I never understood that, but I obliged so we wouldn't argue over anything. It was tough, but I managed. After all, I was his wife.

Jacob smiled at me with warmth behind it.

"I don't get why you're always so understanding about this. I can't for the life of me begin to know why you stick around. I'm sorry you're left alone a lot." He looked at me with sheer sorrow, like he was apologizing for something more. Something, but I had no idea what about.

"Oh gosh, you guys are like a Hallmark movie!" I had totally forgotten Anya was there in our mushy, gushy dialogue. I felt bad that I was ignoring her, but something in her voice made me not feel TOO badly. I hated that I couldn't pick up on any of this.

"Oh, sorry Anya! I'm being rude." I apologized to her. I really did feel bad that I wasn't acknowledging her being there.

"No, no it's okay. I like seeing this. Maybe this is what me and Edward need, some more open communication. I love how you and Jacob are so open about things." There it was. That certain change in her voice. It drove me up a wall.

Dinner after that was simple and sweet, full of conversations between all of us ranging from the kids to what was new in the theaters. It went on for about an hour, but I could never get the knots out of my stomach. Something wasn't right, but I tried to keep myself oblivious.

Once everyone was finished, Edward excused himself to have a cigarette. The kids went back to the toy room to play. Jacob helped me bring all the dishes into the kitchen. Anya waited in the living room with the television turned on, watching some sort of reality show. I began cleaning up and Jacob joined Anya in the living room to watch some television.

"Pssst!" I heard from behind the kitchen door. I jumped. That was not what I was expecting.

"Come here for a second. I need to talk to you about something." The voice said. I looked out the window and felt foolish. It was Edward.

I opened the door and a cool, soft, April breeze welcomed me outside. The smell of fresh cut grass filled the sweet, night air and I took it all in. I could never get used to this.

"Listen," Edward began in a slight whisper. "I don't know if you were picking up on the weird feelings at dinner tonight, but I was."

"Well, yes, I did feel something odd. I just don't know what it was." So I wasn't the only one. Someone else had felt it, too. That's good. Maybe I'm not being paranoid.

"You need to keep an eye on Jacob. Really. I know you guys trust each other and that's all fine and dandy, but at the end of the night when he's not home, you don't know if he's gone or not, do you?" Edward's voice was full of concern.

"Well," I replied, "no..I guess I don't. It's all paid for on a company card, so I never see the bills. All I know is that he has to travel a lot and I understand that. I'm not just going to jump all over him because he has to leave." I was beginning to get a little offended. Edward just met us tonight. How dare he say things like this!

"Okay, I know I'm sounding rude, but please hear me out." His eyes were filled with pleading. He wasn't trying to be obnoxious.

"I'm listening," I told him. I really was listening, but I was growing a bit impatient.

"Anya has been acting really off the past few months. She used to be friends with a lot of the women from around here, but then it seemed like out of no where they began to shun her. Hell, they don't even talk to me anymore. Not even their husbands! They just look at me like they feel sorry for me. I didn't think anything of it until I found our last phone bill in the trash. It was almost $1,000! I tried looking up all our information online, but our passwords were all changed. I had them E-mail me a new password, but when I tried logging into our E-mail account, THAT password was changed, too." He stopped to take a drag of his cigarette. "And now Anya won't even come out for a cigarette with me. She's too busy with her damn cell phone, texting all the time and talking to someone when she thinks I'm asleep."

"So, what are you getting at?" I asked Edward. I was still impatient, but I couldn't help that my curiosity was peaked.

"I think Anya is cheating on me." Edward told me with tears in his eyes.

"Oh, that's too bad!" I said, placing a hand on his shoulder. I never knew how to act in these situations. I'm potentially the worst woman as far as affection with adults goes.

"That's not the worst part, Bella." His voice was shaking.

"Okay," I said. "So, what's up?"

"Haven't you seen the way she was looking at your husband? Didn't you notice the tension between her and Jacob? I had suspicions before that she was cheating on me with some men from the neighborhood, but recently she's been a lot more thorough with everything. When I'm gone, I try to call her but she never answers or, I swear, ignores it and puts me straight to her voicemail. Have you noticed a change in Jacob?" His voice was still a mere whisper, but it sounded volumes louder.

What Edward was saying could put it all into perspective. All the recent business trips, the alienation that began taking place, the dreams, everything. No, I wouldn't believe it. Not my Jacob.

"Edward," I began, "listen. Jacob's my husband and I trust him. Anya is your wife and you should trust her. Hell, if you really ARE suspicious, you need to confront her about it."

"Well…I'd rather talk to you about it first. Bella, I'm pretty sure Jacob is cheating on you. And what's even worse is that I think he's cheating on you with my wife."

Another breeze kicked up, this time much stronger as it seemed to linger in my hair, almost as if it was a sign. Could Edward REALLY be accusing my husband of cheating on me at my own home after I had invited them over for dinner?! This is ridiculous! Who is he to do this?! What right does he think he has to make these types of accusations?! He doesn't know Jacob, he doesn't know me, and he definitely does NOT know any details about our life.

"Okay, Edward. I'm going to go inside and completely forget that you're trying to be a jackass. Good night." I threw the door open, secretly hoping to hit him with it. I stepped back inside the kitchen and finished cleaning up all the plates. I began making my way into the living room when I stopped dead in my tracks at the hallway opening to the things my ears were hearing. I couldn't hear it fully, but bits and pieces broke through the television that seemed to have been turned up.

"…Nice cover…"

"…Got to say it…"

"…No, there's no way…"

"…I do, but…"

"…I can't do it…"

"….the kids…"

"….lost cause…"

* * *

Again, props to **KristineMcCarty**. She's my favorite. 3  
Reviews and shaith? Amazing.


	11. Chapter 10

Once again, everything is owned by SM. Word? Word.

* * *

"Hello?" My voice sounded shaky, nervous, and uncertain in the receiving end of the telephone.

"Okay, what is going on?" Alice demanded. She was always one for getting straight to the point of things. There was never any beating around the bush.

"Well, I don't know where to start," I told her. Part of me knew this was true, but the other part of me knew that the real feeling was I didn't want to relive any of the past experiences I had gone through. The pain was hard to endure.

"From the beginning," Alice demanded. "Start with the E-mail you sent me. That seems to be where this all stemmed from."

"Well," I sighed. "Yeah, there was the E-mail, but the dream I had before I even saw the E-mail is what really shook me. It was so..so absolutely real. It was like I was watching it all happen as someone else."

"So," Alice replied, "tell me about the dream. I need to know everything before I can really give you my opinion, you know." She had a somewhat sarcastic undertone in her voice, one that I was grateful for. It always seemed to have a calming effect on me, though I never could understand why.

"Alright," I began. "In the dream, I had left the house to go do something, I can't remember what right now. I came home and the house was a mess. Jacob hadn't picked up a damn thing."

"What else is new?" Alice interrupted. I could almost picture her rolling her eyes. She knew Jacob almost as well as I did.

"I know," I told her. "It's not a surprise. Anyway, I'm walking through the house and Claire isn't running around like usual. I open her door and check on her and, surprisingly, she's taking a nap. For some reason, Jacob was actually able to put her down for once."

"Woah," Alice said, surprise in her voice. This was a big deal. Claire loves her daddy so much that it's rare she will let him leave her. Jacob putting Claire down for a nap is a huge thing (and it's common knowledge to the masses).

"Yeah," I said. "So, I close her door and hear something coming from our bedroom. I figured Jacob was in there watching TV and fell asleep, so I was going in there to either turn the TV off or let Jacob know I was home, so we could spend some time together. Once I got closer to the door, I heard the voice."

"A voice?!" Alice exclaimed. "You're NOT expecting me to believe it was some ghost or spirit telling you that your husband is a no good, two-timing, trifling boy, right?" I had to stifle a giggle. Alice has this way with her humor that is so unique, it catches you off guard no matter how well you know her. Even in the most stressful state, she can get you to laugh. Sometimes I think she does it on purpose, to kind of make you relax, but I'm sure I'll never know.

"No, just listen to me!" I demanded. There was a brief moment of silence before I began again. "It was some woman, she had one of those nasally voices that makes you cringe. I open the door and she's laying in bed with Jacob, smoking a cigarette. And not one of those regular cigarettes, she's smoking one of those LOOONG ones. I can even remember which brand and everything, Alice. It was THAT real. So then she tells me that I'm not making Jacob happy, that I'm not what he wants, and that I better learn to make him happy quick because she has a husband she has to worry about that's not mine."

"Bella, do you honestly think that will happen? I mean, come ON. It's Jacob. He's a jerk sometimes, but he's not that stupid." Alice was right on the money with that one.

"No, no, I don't think he'd do that. But after that dream was when I went to send that E-mail to you and I found the E-mail from the woman." I explained. "You said you wanted to know everything.

"Yeah, you're right." Alice agreed. "Now, you pretty much explained the E-mail to me already."

"Yep," I told Alice. "Her name is `Anya.'"

"Seriously?" Alice said in disbelief. "Who just names their kid 'Anya'?! I can understand 'Ayana'," but 'ANYA'?!"

"Her real name is Tanya.'" I explained to Alice, who drew in a sharp breath.

"Let me guess," She said. "You think this is the same woman? Bella, really, what are the odds of that happening? And why would Jacob give out his FAMILY E-mail address to a woman he's screwing around with?"

Alice always had to know the ins and outs of things. Thank God for her being so thorough. She always thought things through, a trait I never had.

"Well, I know the odds are slim to none that this is the same woman, but the puzzle pieces are fitting SO perfectly with all of this. It's just the things happening, you know?" I explained. "And about Jacob? It took him a week to learn which icon to click to even OPEN the internet. That would be why he gave out his family E-mail. He doesn't have one through the company because they all do conference calling and he can't figure out how to make a new one. He's trying to be quick with things and cover his tracks, hence why I saw it. He didn't plan for me to wake up in the middle of the night and get online. He didn't think I'd see it. He thought he'd check it in the morning and delete it completely, though I'm sure that took him a while to figure out. I bet he had to check the help page and everything, and the only way he found that was he searched for the place where it said 'help' on the screen."

"Good God," Alice said slowly. "Is he really THAT computer illiterate? That's sad. Let's get with the program, Jacob!"

"I know, right?" I agreed. "So, the next day, I went to the park with Claire--"

"I still haven't gotten those pictures, you know," Alice interrupted.

"Shut up and let me finish!" I said sharply. "So, I take Claire to the park and she plays for a little bit and I get bored. I see Anya just sitting alone and everyone is ignoring her like the plague. I go over and I introduce myself and try to make small talk."

"Okay, but what was she wearing?" Alice asked, as serious as could be.

"Alice, SERIOUSLY?!" I exclaimed. "I'm sitting here having a breakdown and you ask what she wore?! Do you really want to know?"

"No," Alice said. "I need to know."

"Whatever," I said with a sigh. "I think she was wearing this pink jumpsuit-type sweat outfit. The kind old women wear at gyms or while they're power walking with the 80's style headband and stuff."

"I'll throw up," was all Alice could say as she falsely made vomiting noises.

"Okay, then just shut up and listen." I waited for Alice to breathe normally. "She seemed really nice while we were talking. It was just small conversation about our husbands always working and our kids and such. It was pretty short and sweet and Claire ended it pretty well. We were talking about the girls and about how they get all prissy and don't like dirt. Well, as she was saying that, she pointed me in the direction of my dirt-covered child. Literally, Alice, there wasn't a speck of uncovered flesh on the kid."

"I hope I never reproduce," Alice said jokingly.

"Ahem," I coughed, cleared my throat. The conversation went silent for a moment. It was rare to get Alice to stop talking for an explanation, even when she was the one who asked for it.

"So, I grab up Claire and we get ready to leave, but I get her number first and I told her I would call her because we should all get together for dinner one night. As I'm starting down the road home, I get stopped by one of the prudes out of the elite group. She told me that I needed to watch my back with her and I pretty much told her to back off and that it was none of her business." I explained further.

"Woah," was all Alice said.

"What?" I asked.

"You grew some major balls once I left, didn't you?" Alice asked, shock and awe filling her voice.

"It was all in the heat of the moment, an adrenaline rush, I can assure you," I explained. "Anyway, before I could call Anya, I knew I'd have to get Jacob okay with the idea of having company over for dinner."

"You made spaghetti and garlic bread, didn't you?" Alice accused.

"Yes," I admitted. "It's all the ammunition I have to get him to agree to something and plus, Claire eats really well on spaghetti nights."

"Do you even realize how lucky you are to have a guy that has an easy favorite meal? With my luck, I'll get stuck with a guy who needs, not just wants, pork chops made just like his mommy does. I'm not, and never will be, Betty Crocker. Never. I'm not even going to try." Alice really wasn't a dinner type of person. I secretly hoped the man she ended up with was good in the kitchen. All Alice could really crank out was Ramen noodles.

"Ain't that the truth," I agreed with Alice.

"Okay, keep explaining," Alice pushed.

"Well, Claire, Jacob, and I all ate dinner and between having the spaghetti in his stomach and Claire putting him in a good mood, Jacob couldn't really say 'no' to much of anything. It was a slow process, but it worked out in the end. Oh! That reminds me! I went into the kitchen during dinner because I forgot the garlic bread and found the phone bill. It was through the roof! We went WAY over our minutes and text messages and I don't even know how we did that. I rarely use the phone unless I call or text Jacob and I know that I wasn't the one who went over. I even kept the bill. I think it's still in my pocket because I haven't done the most recent laundry yet. I wanted to call the number and see who it was.

Anyway, after dinner Jacob took Claire into the living room for their playtime before Claire's bath. I start cleaning up the dishes and stuff and Jacob's phone vibrates because it's always on silent. I don't recognize the number, so I go to answer it. There was some woman on the other line to said that she had the wrong number and hung up on me. I was a little offended, I'm not going to lie about that.

After everything was finished, I went into the living room while Jacob took Claire and got her in the tub and ready for bed. I went and made the bed for Jacob, gave him a kiss good-night, and then went to check for your E-mail, and sure enough I got one. One that was filled with a Greek God and a one night stand."

"Hey!" Alice exclaimed. "Don't judge! If you saw him, you would've jumped his bones, too!"

"Alright," I said with a slight laugh. "So, the next day I call Anya and arrange everything for dinner and when Jacob gets home, we all got in the car and went grocery shopping. We stopped at McDonalds for dinner, which seemed to get Jacob in a bad mood. I don't know why, but it was like he had been waiting for dinner to already be cooked."

"It's because you set the bar too high," Alice explained. "The trick is to keep it low so that it's never expected of you. That's how you have to work it."

"Shut up," I told her. "So, we get to McDonalds and Claire takes off in the play place. Jacob brings our food and he's constantly on the phone texting someone. I figured that he was just mad about a problem at work or something, but he wouldn't let me even catch a glimpse of his phone. So, Jacob is eating and texting someone, Claire comes only to eat and then just leaves to play again, and I'm left there alone. I never thought I could be surrounded by so many people and feel so secluded at the same time, Alice. It was such a bad feeling.

Once Jacob finished eating, he booked it out of there and told me he was going to go wait in the car. I get Claire's shoes back on and everything, finish cleaning up, and take Claire outside. The car mysteriously vanished. I had to walk around the parking lot with Claire before I found where Jacob re-parked. He parked over by the trees. He looked like he was trying to hide.

So we get close to the car and Jacob is yelling through the phone at someone, I don't know who, saying that he won't let something happen and everything will work out and that whoever he's talking to just needs to keep their mouth shut. He got off the phone as soon as he saw us, really quickly actually. I asked him about it once I got Claire strapped into her car seat and he brushed it off and changed his attitude completely.

When we got to Wal-Mart, he was all flirty like he used to be. He held me and joked with me, it was like we were dating again. It was so nice. We were the old us, not the new, and definitely not improved, us. We all had a good time. Then once we got home..well..things were nice."

"Yeah, I'm not going to ask for details on that one," Alice said, sarcastic disgust filling her voice. "I don't need to know the ins and outs of what goes on behind your bedroom door, thanks."

"Okay, okay," I said with surrender. "Anyway, I woke up the next morning and Jacob left a really sweet note for me that said he loved me and this and that. We had the whole romance thing back until today. Everyone was happier. It was nice. I started getting everything ready for dinner tonight little by little. I started cleaning the house up bit by bit so my work load wouldn't be as much. Jacob actually helped here and there, I was shocked.

So, today rolls around and I'm in the kitchen making dinner and Jacob and Claire are in the living room playing when the door bell rang. I ran to answer it, and probably a bit too quickly. I probably looked desperate."

"What were they wearing?"

"Alice!"

"Fine!" Alice exclaimed. "I'll just get all those details later. Just tell me about the dinner."

* * *

The ending of the phone conversation will be in the next chapter. Hope you enjoy! Reviews and such? Uh-may-zing.  
And, ofcourse, HUGE shout out to **KristineMcCarty**. She's my hero.  
OH! And **CallMeEmbrys**? You're pretty fantastic!


	12. Chapter 11

Again, errything belongs to SM. I'm too cheap.

* * *

"Fine!" Alice exclaimed. "I'll just get all those details later. Just tell me about the dinner."

Alice had some sort of disappointment in her voice, but it wasn't an ample amount.

"Well, when they came through the door, Anya went through and introduced the family. I went to shake Edward's hand, and this sort of electricity sparked between us, I don't know how to explain it." I explained.

"I think the term 'static electricity' covers it pretty well," Alice said sarcastically.

"Yeah, okay. Well, the dinner itself was great. I made a mean fettuccini alfredo, if I do say so myself. The kids all seemed to play pretty nicely together. Jacob and Edward -- that's Anya's husband -- talked pretty briefly while they were watching a baseball game. Jacob showed his true nerd and brought up Dumb and Dumber. I overheard that much. But throughout dinner? It was mainly me trying to keep it alive. I tried hard, but it's easier said than done. That's a lot of conversation for one person."

"Yeah," Alice agreed. "Especially for you. When you get to talking in an uncomfortable situation, you--"

"Shut up, Alice," I said sharply, cutting her off.

"What?" Alice chuckled. "So you ramble when you get uncomfortable. A lot of people do it. It's pretty common, actually. Emmett does it a lot."

She was right. I missed her brother, but that boy could talk your head off. He was always really funny, though. Everything was a joke with him.

"Yeah, whatever," I said, brushing Alice off. "So, I'm trying to keep the conversation going between all of us, but I failed epically. Thank God the kids were at the table with us. That was enough entertainment for years.

Once dinner was over, I started clearing the table. Jacob and Anya went in the living room to watch TV, the kids all went into the soon-to-be nursery to play, because as of right now it's a toy room for Claire, and Edward went outside to smoke. He sees me cleaning up in the kitchen and gets my attention and has me go outside with him. He starts talking to me and tells me that he thinks Anya is cheating on him."

"Well, sucks to be him," Alice said sarcastically. "Maybe he should've read up on the Kama Sutra to keep her happy or something."

"Alice," I said slowly. "Edward thinks Anya is sleeping with Jacob."

"WHAT?!" Alice exclaimed loudly, probably loud enough to wake everyone in her city.

"Yeah," I said softly. "He said that the dinner kind of sealed the deal on his decision about it, more or less."

"I'll kill that home wrecker." Alice spoke sternly.

"JACOB?!"

"NO! Edward!" I breathed a sigh of relief for Alice's explanation. "He's trying to screw you and Jacob up! That's not right! Just because he's unhappy in his marriage doesn't mean he's allowed to screw you two up."

"I don't think he's trying to screw us up, I think he's trying to warn me if anything," I explained, trying to calm Alice down. "The worst part is that I think he's right. If you would've seen the tension between them at dinner and everything, you would think so, too."

The phone speaker was filled with the buzz of silence, something unusual for one of our conversations. It was awkward, uncomfortable, and unnerving.

"Alice?" I asked quietly into the receiver.

"Why would he be right?!" Alice blew up. "HOW could he be right?! He's a stranger and Jacob's your husband! Jacob would never cheat on you!"

"Wanna bet?" I challenged Alice with suspicion in my voice. I knew Alice would pick up on it quickly.

"Spill it. Now." Alice wasn't playing any games.

"I came back inside after yelling at Edward for thinking that Jacob would cheat on me and overheard a conversation between Jacob and Anya, a conversation that I don't think I was supposed to hear. It was mainly a lot of whispers and things like that, they kept it pretty quiet, but there were some things that I caught that just..they just didn't sit right, not with everything going on."

"Seriously, Bella?! All I've been worrying about is whispers and things? Nothing solid?" Alice had relief woven through every word she spoke. I knew she was thinking the worst.

"Well, there was also the phone call he got tonight after everyone went home and he went to bed. The one I overheard outside the bedroom door. The one where he called someone else 'baby.'" I laid the bait, now all I had to do was wait.

"Tell me about THAT!" Alice demanded, taking the bait so well.

"There's really not much to tell. When you E-mailed me, telling me that you felt like something was wrong, I got suspicious. Jacob went in the bedroom to go to bed and I overheard him brushing in teeth--"

"The bad feeling I got was NOT about dental hygiene!" Alice cut me off abruptly.

"I know, Alice. I was getting ready to walk away from the door when I heard Jacob climb into bed until I heard his phone vibrate. He had to have it on the dresser or something, it was LOUD. So, he answers the phone really quietly and tells someone over the phone that he needed to sleep, he knew tonight was awkward, that things will get better, and that 'she' has no idea. I don't know who 'she' is, or the person who called, but the person was always 'baby' from Jacob, and he made sure to tell them to have sweet dreams about him. Alice, I don't remember the last time I cried so hard." The memory of the few moments ago brought hot tears to my eyes.

"Well, listen," Alice said slowly, sounding like she was trying to make sense of it all. "You're not absolutely positive that Jacob is cheating. I mean, sure, everything points in that direction, but still, it's Jacob. He would never do that to you. I was there to see the way you always gave each other googly eyes. It was enough to make me sick to my stomach. Actually, there were a couple times where I threw up a little bit in my mouth, I remember those days. Not the most pleasant. I always had to make sure I had some gum with me."

"Okay, so what do you suppose I do?" I asked Alice, annoyance in my voice. I love Alice, but sometimes when she gets sidetracked, I'd just love to smack her back on track. It can be pretty hard to discuss issues with her.

"Well," Alice said slowly. "Let's see…you could always play a bit of detective. You remember that stake out we had in high school on Sam?"

"Ooooh, I remember THAT one," I said, laughing.

Sam was Alice's ex-boyfriend through the second year of high school and she had good suspicions that he was cheating on her. We went and followed him in my dad's car, one that he didn't recognize, until he parked at an apartment complex just outside our city limits, met a girl there from a rival school, and went inside her place. We had a good time, calling pizza places and--

"Alice!" I exclaimed. "I can't do that to Jacob! First, we only have ONE car! Second, I have Claire! Third, I don't have the guts to do that anymore! Last time was scary enough!"

On our stake out with Sam, we didn't call the pizza places for us. We kept ordering pizzas to the address he was hidden out at. After about the fifth pizza, Sam ran out of the apartment, got in his car, and sped out onto the road in the direction of city. We both knew where he was going in that speed. We raced back to Alice's house, which was luckily just down the street from mine. We were literally within seconds of Sam arriving. Adrenaline coursed through our veins as we parked my dad's car back in my driveway and raced to Alice's house. We were lucky that it was almost softball season and Alice could use that as an excuse for us running.

"I needed to start getting in better shape," she had explained to a VERY upset Sam, "and Bella didn't want to leave me alone." Sam looked at us both with disgust, especially when Alice continued the conversation about how he was supposed to be at work, before breaking up with him for being a liar and a jerk. The whole town talked about that break up for a bit. It was very public, right in the middle of the road between our houses, with the nosy neighbors coming outside to see what was going on.

"Alright," Alice agreed. "But, what if you wait until Jacob has another business trip to go on?"

"And what if he's actually on a business trip?" I challenged.

"Before you hop in the car with Claire, call his office and say that you misplaced the number to where he was staying," Alice came up with, brilliantly. "Say that his cell phone has been messing up and won't let calls through and you need the other number in case of an emergency. If they don't give you the number, you know he's out somewhere."

"Yeah," I admitted, "that's a good idea. And I'm sure I wouldn't have to go alone. Edward is pretty torn up about all this and wants answers, probably more than I do."

"Bella," Alice said in a wary voice. "You just met this guy. How do you know he's not some axe murderer? The family could all be a cover up. He could be a contract killer, for Christ's sake! Jacob could've put a hit out on you!"

"For the love of God, Alice!" I said with exasperation in my voice. "You don't think Jacob would cheat on me, but it's possible for him to put a hit out on me? Are you serious?"

"You're right," Alice agreed. "Jacob loves you, but I don't know if he thinks you're worth paying that much to just knock off."

"Gee, thanks Alice," I said. "It's nice to know how you feel in all of this."

"Whatever, Bella," Alice replied in her sarcastic, witty voice. "Seriously, though, why don't you do some digging and stuff? You know that phone bill? If you still have it, go through the numbers and call them on a pay phone, so it can't come back on you. See who everyone is. Explain that it's your husband's phone that it came up on and you were just curious because your bill was extremely high. Chances are, if something is going on, you'll get a hold of a woman who does not appreciate being found out, leading to yelling and such. You can also go through the car more thoroughly. Search the little pockets that didn't seem like they meant anything. Hell, before you wash Jacob's clothes, smell them. It's little things that he is careless about that'll get him caught.

Alice was right. It sucked, but she was right. She knew what she was talking about with all of this, and I was going to listen to her. I had to.

"Alright," I told her. "I'll try my hand at all of this. I kind of hope I find something out, as bad as that sounds, so I know I get something for my troubles."

"I hope you get something so I can come out there," Alice replied. "I don't have the money to shell out for a ticket back home just on some suspicion. I need some hard evidence. Then, I'll shell out the money to kill Jacob for you. Consider me your hitman."

"You're my Jimmy "The Tulip" Tudeski," I told Alice.

"What?!" She asked.

"Okay, I know you've seen The Whole Nine Yards," I told her.

"You guys have GOT to stop watching all these movies," she told me.

Our phone call ended with a laugh and a plan, something I was needing for a long time. I finally had my thoughts in order on what I would be doing. I knew Jacob was leaving soon for a business trip and I would have to pounce on that opportunity as it rose. But for now, I had to bide my time.

I left the living room silently, turning off all the lights on my way back to the bedroom. I climbed into bed carefully, half because of my protruding abdomen, half because I didn't want to wake Jacob. As I finally became settled under the blankets, Jacob rolled in his sleep, kissed my cheek, and wrapped his arms around me.

This spying thing was going to be harder to handle than I thought.

* * *

So....well...there's been a TON of things going on with me lately, so this may take a while to crank out. HOWEVER, it's definitely NOT on a stand-still.  
Special thanks to **Kristine McCarty**. She rocks my face off.  
Reviews and junk? They're incredible.


	13. Chapter 12

All characters are owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm not that creative, lol.

* * *

When I woke the next morning, the streaming sunlight in my face had a calming effect on my jittery self. As I proceeded to stand up, I began remembering why I was so jittery. The phone call with Alice had made a deep impact.

I made my way slowly into the kitchen, where I ran into Jacob, who was holding a cup of coffee and looking startled to see me.

"Oh, Bella!" He exclaimed, surprise in every syllable leaving his lips. "I was trying to be quiet, I wanted to let you sleep. I just had to check the E-mail. It looks like I have to go on a business trip at the end of this month. I'm sorry."

As Jacob spoke to me, I searched his face for meaning behind his words. Though his facial expression screamed true remorse, it did not seem that it was just for the business trip.

"That's alright," I said with a sigh. "It's just part of your job description. We knew this when you took the job. I just never thought that we'd be going through all of this with kids until later, you know?"

Jacob placed his arm around my shoulder and brought me into his chest softly and delicately, as if I were to break at any moment. His heart was slowly regulating its rhythmic beating, as if he had just finished running a marathon.

"I know this is tough on you," Jacob spoke with, what sounded like, false understanding. "I know that Claire is a handful just herself, but with you being pregnant, it makes it even harder. I really wish there was something I could do about all of this."

"Well, you gotta do what you gotta do," I told him, a mild undertone of resentment in my voice. Jacob picked up on it automatically and released me from his grasp.

"Bella," he began solemnly. "You know I never wanted to do this to you. You know how much I love you. If I didn't, do you really think I would feel like this about all these trips? At the time, it was the only job I could take that would support us well enough and now I've built such great ties with the company, I can't just leave and start over. The economy is bad enough and with Claire alone we struggle from time to time. To start over with another baby on the way would just be stupid of me. I couldn't put my family in that position. I love you all too much."

Tears swam in his eyes as he spoke those last words and softly made their slow journey down his cheeks. He turned and wiped them away, trying quickly to regain composure. It wasn't often that Jacob wore his heart on his sleeve, openly admitting his thoughts and feelings.

I moved away from Jacob quickly, shuffling my bunny slippers into the kitchen, trying to keep balance. I needed to get away from him. He hated to show weakness, it was something he thought he should always hide.

I began tearing through the refrigerator, looking for some food that would sound remotely appetizing, though I came up empty-handed. I moved to the cabinets, searching relentlessly, but only coming up with peanut butter. I hated mornings like this one. The thought of knowing I needed to eat compared to the thought of vomiting everything because it didn't taste right was never appealing.

I sank into the hard, maple chair in the dining room and sat the peanut butter on the table. Spoon in hand, I began to take small bites. Despite my efforts, the peanut butter didn't taste right and the texture of it sticking to the roof of my mouth was triggering my gag reflux.

With a sigh, I lifted myself up from the chair and made my way back into the kitchen. After putting the peanut butter back into the cabinet and the spoon in the dishwasher, I began my scavenger hunt for food again. Finally, I stumbled upon something I thought was long gone. My eyes widened, my stomach did flips, my mouth watered. I had spotted a can of beef ravioli.

The ravioli couldn't heat fast enough in the microwave. I pulled it out and began digging in as soon as the green, digital numbers came close to an end of their countdown. I was halfway through when I realized my stomach still felt empty. Frustrated, I began thinking about how the baby was eating all of my food.

Ohh, that's mine. Not yours, I thought to myself before laughing lightly. _Alice is right. I really need to stop watching movies. Especially now. Quoting **Knocked Up** while pregnant has to have some sort of irony that some people just might not find as funny as I do._

I finished the rest of the ravioli quickly and cleaned up after myself. I shuffled my way into the bedroom and saw Jacob getting dressed. This was pretty odd for him. He usually liked to spend his Sundays in his boxers, planted in front of the television.

"Where are you going?" I asked, awestruck. Jacob jumped and looked at me, a bit shocked and unaware of anything.

"Oh, my boss just called. They need me for a couple of hours. Something happened with the filing and it's all a big mess. I'll bet $50 that an intern got a hold of them and just caused a bunch of chaos. That's what happened when you have no idea what you're doing." Jacob spoke rushed, as if he was trying to cover something up without really giving that notion. It didn't work very well.

"But, it's Sunday," I said, confusion and persecution dripping from every word. "They're closed on Sunday."

"I know, that's what I don't get about all of this. But I have to go in either way." The way Jacob's words left his mouth sounded almost like a plea in defense. "I'm sorry, but it's my job."

"Okay," I agreed slowly and cautiously. "When should you be home?"

"I don't know," Jacob admitted while shrugging his shoulders. "It shouldn't be more than a couple of hours, but I'll call and let you know for sure when I get there."

Jacob took one last look into the mirror, gave me a small kiss on my forehead, and then rushed out the door. I knew Claire was going to be crushed. She loved spending her Sundays with her daddy. It was almost the only time she could get alone with him.

I stared after him, dismay plastered over my face.

This doesn't make sense, I thought to myself. They're closed on Sunday. Why would they be calling him in? Who would be calling him in? Who would be there to call him in? This isn't adding up..but I'm probably just over-thinking it. I have to be. Jacob wouldn't leave Claire like that, not on their day. He knows how important these are to her.

I heaved a sigh and made my way to our bathroom. I knew Claire wouldn't be awake for another couple of hours, so I took a relaxing shower and tried to clear my head. I just couldn't seem to get it clear enough. Images kept popping up of Jacob being with someone else, their face hazy and unclear, like an out of focus picture.

It has to be the hormones, I told myself. You're getting close to popping this bun out of the oven, you're going nuts. Just let it go.

I stepped out of the shower repeating to myself that I just needed to let it go. If not for my sanity, for Claire. She shouldn't have to see me so frazzled, no matter how pregnant I was.

Time passed as I dried off and got dressed. All that letting go of the crazy Jacob thoughts made me realize that I had to make arrangements for Jacob's business trip. I had doctor's appointments every two weeks now. I had to find a baby-sitter for Claire. I had to plan meals further in advance so that I could just go on one shopping trip.

I had to plan my spying game.

* * *

Sooooooooo...lol. That was a LOOONG wait between chapters. I apologize. I've had a lot going on in life lately, but I keep trying and trying. If not for anyone reading, but for myself. I appreciate the readers, even if you never comment *ahem*.  
Special shout outs to my girl **KristineMcCarty **and **CallMeEmbrys**. It seems like they ALWAYS read and comment, no matter what. Check them out, for real.


	14. Chapter 13

I don't own any of these characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyer.

* * *

I shuddered at the thought of me being a spy. I was never really good at it. I didn't have a poker face. Hell, I couldn't even PLAY poker without losing. I couldn't make people believe I was innocent. How was I supposed to pull of stealthy?

I made my way through the house slowly and cautiously. I wanted a few minutes alone to check my E-mail and see if Alice had written me about our conversation last night. If I had any luck in the world, she would've E-mailed me and given me more directions that were far more specific on what to do right and how to get out of being caught. She was always the best with these things.

Turns out, Lady Luck decided she was suffering from premenstrual syndrome.

When I logged into our account, I saw that the entire thing had been cleared out. The SPAM folder, clear. The Trash folder, clear. The Inbox, clear. The Outbox, clear. The Drafts, clear.

The Address Book, clear.

For a split second, I wondered why Jacob felt the need to take the time to clear out everything, including my address book. That address book held most of the information I needed to be able to get into contact with some of my old friends, though I never really took advantage of it. And then, like a spark of electricity, I knew.

The Address Book automatically saved every E-mail address that had E-mailed us, as well as the address to every E-mail we've sent. Jacob is trying to hide something.

A red flag went off in my brain as I stared at the bright computer monitor. My eyes felt dry and I began seeing little, red spots, but I couldn't blink. I couldn't tear my eyes away. I couldn't move. Shock filled every crevice of my body and left me stiff, rigid, and immobile.

This can't be right, I tried to persuade myself into believing. He was just trying to make sure we had enough megabytes of space in our inbox and tried to delete the junk and then hit something that was wrong. Everyone knows how computer illiterate Jacob is. This was all just a mistake. Nothing is coming from this. Nothing.

As many times as I said those words to myself, I couldn't really believe them. I sat in half a state of denial, half a state of panic and hurt. It was like a war raging through my mind without any sign of end. There was only one thing I could do.

Mustering up the muscle control to move, I brought my shaking hand to the mouse and clicked on the "X" in the top, right corner of the screen. Now, the only thing staring back at me was the cheesy grin of Claire as the background photo.

Claire woke up soon after that, very disappointed and upset that Jacob wasn't home. The day was full of toys flying through the air, landing in random spots like bombs over Tokyo after the attack on Pearl Harbor. She kicked, screamed, scratched, cried, almost anything and everything imaginable to show her frustration. It was very hard to keep a level head throughout the temper tantrums, but they eventually died down.

Claire exhausted herself throughout the day, which made her whole bedtime routine a breeze, despite that Jacob still wasn't home. Once I put a very tired Claire into bed, I grabbed my cell phone and punched in Jacob's number.

"Hey, this is Jacob. Leave a message at the--" I hung up quickly in a fit of frustration and anger, my face heated as the blood rushed into my cheeks.

Why would he turn in phone off?, I wondered to myself, enraged. _He knows that something could always go wrong, especially with me being pregnant. On silent, I can understand, but completely OFF?! He's going to get an earful when he walks through that door._

Jacob escaped the earful by not coming home until I went to sleep.

I woke up the next morning to a dreaming Jacob laying next to me, smelling like a fresh shower. He had cleaned himself up, that was obvious, but I couldn't put my finger on the reasoning. I can't begin to tell anyone of how many bed sheets we've had to throw out in the past because he'd ruined them, refusing to take a shower.

I looked at the alarm clock and realized Jacob must've slept through his alarm, meaning he was late for work. I debated with myself and finally decided that I should wake him up. Despite being absolutely fumed with him, we depended on his income. He needed the job. Being late wasn't an option.

I shook him violently, only to have him push me aside and roll over. This continued for a few minutes before my frustration with him reached its peak.

"Jacob!" I yelled into his ear. "You are SO late, it's not even funny."

I had never seen Jacob move faster than in the split seconds it took for him to jump out of bed. He ran, scatterbrained, throughout the room, randomly picking up items of clothing and sniffing them to check and see if they would pass the ability to be worn without being washed. He clearly left the freshly washed, neatly folded clothes that laid in the laundry basket at the foot of our bed, waiting to be put away.

"I think I'll end up having to stay late," he told me breathlessly, glancing at the clock. "There's no way I'll be able to make it on time."

"Well, maybe they should've let you come home a bit earlier last night. That way, you wouldn't be so damn tired in the morning and would wake up on time. Not to mention, maybe get to see us." The rage that was built up last night was still there, sitting, waiting for its eruption.

"Well," Jacob began slowly. "Well, it was rough yesterday. There was a BUNCH of fixing we had to do. Afterwords, me and a bunch of the guys just wanted to get a drink or two and relax." The look in his eyes as he spoke those words only confirmed that I was turning red. The heat in my cheeks was overpowering. I knew I was a ticking time bomb.

"We'll talk when we get home," Jacob said as he stepped out of the door cautiously, not daring to try to get a good-bye kiss.

As I heard the front door latch and the car start up, I punched my pillow over and over, making an indention that I could swear would be permanent. Jacob wasn't always like this, and the sudden change in him was almost unbearable.

You took vows, I reminded myself. For better or for worse, right? Well, this is the worse part of that. Just stick it out. You will be okay. You're Jacob and Bella. You're meant to be.

If only what my thoughts were saying were true. I wished so badly that we were back in the days of high school, passing notes in between classes and stealing glances when we thought we wouldn't be seen.

I laid my head back into the indention I had made in my pillow and tried to clear my head of everything. It worked for a brief moment, until my phone began beeping at me uncontrollably.

**Doctor Appointment - 2:00pm  
**  
Never before had I felt the sudden urge to chuck my phone across the room into a wall like now. I had completely forgotten that I had a doctor's appointment today. It was a fairly important one, as I had been having random, sporadic contractions throughout the entire pregnancy. It was even thought that I may not be able to carry the baby to term.

I rubbed my protruding abdomen clockwise as I tried to come up with a plan on how to make it to the doctor's appointment and taking care of Mackenzie. I would have to get a taxi, because Jacob would never be able to leave work to give me the car and watch Claire..oh, Claire. I'd have to find a baby-sitter. Last time I took her to the doctor, she screamed in horror as I was being examined. A sudden punch to my hand ended my thoughts briefly. I smiled.

"It's okay, kiddo," I spoke softly to my, now inside out, navel. "Mommy will figure out something. You'll be fine…Leah." Leah? Never before had I really thought about a name for this little one, but Leah just came to me. I said it over and over again to myself. I liked it. Now, I'd just have to get Jacob to agree. Looks like I'd be having to swallow down spaghetti some other night this week.

I laid in bed for a few more minutes, trying to think of a middle name to go with Leah, just the way I wanted it to be, when a rumble down the hallway caught my attention.

_CLANG!  
__  
BAM!_

"MAMA! 'AKE UP!" Claire shouted through her door and she began knocking on the old, worn wood that was her door. I could almost promise that the door would only hold for a few more months before she could break through it like the Incredible Hulk.

"I'm coming, Claire-bear," I said loudly, more so in a grunt, as I began my fight to get onto my feet. When I was finally in sitting position, I looked to my feet and realized that they had grown overnight. In fact, my hands and almost everything else looked like it had. Not normal growing and not normal pregnancy weight gain. They were more…enlarged in an odd way. They were swollen greatly.

All I could think is that I was a human balloon, retaining water. If I were a boat, I'd be the worst kind. A one way death trap.

I made my way, slowly and slightly more unbalanced, to Claire's room and let the shenanigans begin. As we ate breakfast, I kept trying to think of someone I could have watch her while I went to my appointment. There was no way I could reschedule. The further along I get, the more important these appointments are. I needed to go.

I racked my brain over and over again, only to keep coming to a dead end. Ever since Alice moved away, I lost our circle that we once spent time with. Everyone split ways, as expected, but it left me completely alone and isolated. It was hard, but an adjustment I had to make for the sake of my family.

Claire made her way over to me from her usual spot in front of the television and patted me on the leg, flashing her semi-toothy smile. She was such a little ham.

In any case, I thought to myself, I could just bring her with me again. Sure, it might scar her for life, but…

No. That wasn't an option. Last time, Claire attacked the doctor when she tried to use the fetal Doppler on my stomach. Claire had become extremely protective of me since I became pregnant, even before I knew.

With a sigh, I waddled my way into the kitchen where I had left my cell phone. I picked it up and looked at the bright, green screen. No missed calls. No text messages. I was quite unpopular since I married Jacob.

I dialed in Jacob's cell phone, hoping and praying that he had it turned on this time.

_Ring!_

Ring!

"Hello?" Jacob answered, somewhat sounding breathless as if he had run a mile. "Bella? Are you alright?"

"Yeah, everything's fine," I replied, a little caught off guard by his sudden care and concern for what was going on. "Actually, we have a little predicament that I need help with."

"And what would that be?" Jacob asked, a bit of an edge in his voice. I knew that he was remembering that he told me we would talk when he got home. No doubt in my mind, he was thinking I was getting ready to bombard him with questions, accusations, and off the wall ass-chewings.

"I have a doctor's appointment today at 2. I know you have the car and probably can't get off work, I can call a taxi, that's not an issue. The issue is, the last time I took Claire, it was awful. Is there anyone you know that could watch her?"

There was a small pause in our conversation, filling me with anxiety.

"Well," Jacob sighed. "I can't really think of anyone off the bat that could watch her. I mean, I could try to get off work, but with me being late I doubt that would even be a possibility. Can't you call Anya?"

"I didn't think of that," I told Jacob, lying through my gritted teeth. Of course I had thought of her. And, of course, I shot that idea down. This was the woman that I was assuming to be my husband's mistress. Why should I, or would I for that matter, leave my child with her? Why would I want to associate myself with her anymore?

"Bells?" Jacob said questioningly. "You still there?"

"Yeah, I'm here." I answered. "I'll call her. That's all I needed."

"Oh. Okay. Well, just to give you a heads up, they're having me stay late to work. They're really upset that I was late, completely overlooking the fact that I came in on my day off to fix their screw ups." Jacob's voice had a tone of anger, but it seemed to be overpowered by remorse. False remorse. I couldn't listen to it. I got the strong vibe that he was lying to me.

"That's fine," I told him, coldly. "I'll talk to you later."

Jacob and I said good-bye and hung up with each other on a rather odd note. Something didn't seem right between us, but I couldn't place my finger on it. For conversations like the one I just had, I really wished I had Alice's uncanny gut feelings.

I pulled the phone from my ear and went through my phone book. After having Anya's number highlighted, I pressed the green, dial key. I really didn't want to have to call her, but beggars can't be choosers. I was desperate.

_Ring!_

Ring!

"Hello?" A man's voice was in the receiver.

"Um, hi. This is Bella Black. Is Anya there?" My voice was shaky and uncertain. The man's voice had surprised me.

"Oh! Hello, Bella! It's Edward. I'm sorry, Anya isn't here. She went with some of her friends from out of town. They're in Las Vegas for the week. Did you need anything?" Edward spoke so..so..I couldn't even describe it. It was serene, yet bold. Soothing, but booming. The tone in his voice was like Jacob's once was.

"Well, nothing really," I said hesitantly. "I was just looking for a baby-sitter. I have a doctor's appointment today, and last time I took Claire with me, she went crazy banshee on the doctor."

Edward chuckled slightly and composed himself fast. Even that small laugh was contagious, as I stifled my own giggle.

"Well, she's not here, but I have the kids alone for a week. If you want, you're welcome to bring Claire over here so she can play with Kate and Garret. I'm sure they'd enjoy the company. They really seemed to get along." Edward had a certain charm in his voice, as if he was a male siren.  
"Well, if you won't mind, then..sure." My knees felt like jell-o. His voice made my heart skip a beat. I couldn't tell what it was, but it was definitely not static electricity this time. "It's at 2. I'll get a taxi and bring Claire over there around 1. Is that okay?"

"A taxi?" Edward gasped slightly. "No, I'll come pick you guys up. We have a van, it's no big deal. I'll get you and take you to your appointment and then you'll call me when you're done and we'll all come get you. You don't need to be wasting your money on a taxi when you have a perfectly good person here. I got your back."

"Well, um, okay then. I'll see you around 1." I hung up the phone with butterflies in my stomach. Something about seeing Edward again made me feel like a little kid with pent up energy.

I waddled back into the living room, where Claire was still playing, and sat down. My eyes couldn't stay off the clock as I impatiently waited until the right time to begin getting ready for, not only the doctor, but to see Edward.

* * *

And BAM! Two chapters! w00t! It'll probably be a bit of a gap for the next few chapters, but I'm trying my hardest!  
Again, **KristineMcCarty** is uh-may-zing. **CallMeEmbrys**? Probably the best reader EVER, always leaving her comments. She makes me happy. :)


	15. Chapter 14

I don't own any of the characters. They belong to Stephanie Meyer.

* * *

I think anxiety is about 20 times worse when you're pregnant. The rushes of hormones really make you freak out more about things. I haven't really had a problem controlling it thus far, but the more I thought about Edward coming and the car ride, the more my insides felt like they were turning – I don't think it was Leah's doing this time.

I was nervous. Something about Edward made me want to believe everything he told me. The cards were all falling to support his case. But what if he was just charismatic? Hitler was charismatic. Look at the damage he did. But waiting for Edward wasn't the only thing making me nervous.

I was really nervous about this appointment. I'm sure everything is fine, as I haven't really had any major causes for concerns, but something didn't seem right. If there's a pregnancy intuition, I think mine is going into overdrive. Something just doesn't seem right.

I had to do something to pass the time. I couldn't just sit here and dwell on my worries – that would drive any person crazy. Instead, I threw myself into cleaning the house. I put everything back in its place, laundry was folded neatly and put away, and then I got down on my hands and knees to scrub the floors. But when that only passed 2 hours of my time, I felt beaten. Maybe I was supposed to think about everything, maybe something inside me knew that. But that part of me had to be shut up. There was just too much going on to wrap my head around anything.

I didn't want to step near the computer. It seems like everytime I go near it lately, I find something I don't want to find, and it's not just some disgusting pornography pop-ups anymore. So I did what anyone else in my situation would do.

I sat on the couch behind Claire, put my ear buds in, and let the music on my iPod drown my world out.

My iPod on shuffle is a force to be reckoned with. It will drive a "normal" person up a wall, but it's great for me. It jumps from every genre you could imagine – Tegan and Sara, Tool, Eminem, Taking Back Sunday, 12 Stones, Britney Spears, Breaking Benjamin, Hanson, Spice Girls, well, you get the idea. Jacob never enjoyed my taste in music. He always said I jumped around too much. I always said that a real love for music means not discriminating against anything. Oh well. That was a battle I'd never win. My radio rights in the car had long been revoked.

Claire turned around and saw me sitting on the couch, a huge smile creeping on her face. She quickly climbed herself into my lap, her large eyes speaking her question for her. With a sigh, I unplugged my ear buds so that the music would play through on its speakers.

"No mommy." Claire wasn't picky about music, but she really enjoyed rock most of all. My current track by Gorillaz wasn't cutting it for her. I switched songs until I finally stumbled upon her favorite song. She would sing it for anyone.

"Yay! I ill nah bow!" Claire sang proudly. I couldn't help but laugh. Her squeaky voice belting out Breaking Benjamin always warmed my heart. They have always been one of my favorites.

Claire and I could sit on the couch for hours listening to music, occasionally getting up to get our dance on here and there. Today, particularly, it helped my mind calm and pass the time. By the time I looked at the clock again, it was lunchtime.

Claire requested a PB&J, her favorite, and I sat her on my side of Jacob's and my bed to eat. This isn't a routine thing in our house, but while she ate I needed to get ready for my doctor's appointment. _And Edward_, I thought to myself.

I popped a movie in for Claire to watch as she ate and I went into our bathroom, leaving the door open so I could make sure Monster Claire never attacked.

I turned to the mirror and something in my face looked a bit off – a little chunkier, a little pinker. Maybe my eyes were playing tricks on me, I don't know, but the difference was so slight. I don't understand how I even saw it. I guess it's true what they say about women – we notice everything.

To offset the unusual redness, I broke out my green concealer. It sounds weird, but I think every woman needs some of this stuff. It counteracts the redness and mutes it, and who doesn't love that? It blends out, too, so you don't look like a lost alien trying to mingle with society. On top of that, I added my regular foundation and set it with translucent powder. I looked over my complexion and blessed my make-up. _Thank you, sweet beauty products, for giving me a confidence boost and a near flawless face. _Normally, I'd follow up with some blush, but it wasn't really necessary. Despite my best efforts, I had a natural flushed look on my face. I wasn't complaining, but it was out of the ordinary and I don't like change. Oh well, moving on.

Eye shadow is always my favorite part to do, but it's also always the most annoying. I love using different colors, combinations, and designs, but I never can decide what I'm doing. Since my skin was already radiating a natural look, I decided to try and keep it as toned down as possible; neutral browns and creams would be my best friends today. I used a beige color all over my lid to my brown bone and threw in some caramel and bronze, slightly smoking out the end. Then I lined my eyes in a deep mocha shade. But when I looked in the mirror, it didn't look right – there wasn't enough color. I almost just wiped it all off and started over, but I didn't want to have to do that. Instead, I put a light sweep of a lavender on my lids, making my eyes pop. Some mascara wand swooshes later, my make-up was finished.

I leaned into the doorway to check up on Claire. She was being a little princess. She had finished her sandwich quick, probably gobbled it all down after I got done with my foundation. Now she was lying on her stomach, elbows bent on the bed and her head propped up on her hands. She really can be quite an angel sometimes.

I guess I caught her peripheral vision, because her head slowly peeled away from the movie to look back at me.

"Oh, mama. You so pwetty!" She flashed me a gap-toothed grin before turning back to the television. My heart melted. I missed getting compliments like that from Jacob all the time, but I'd gladly take them from my Claire.

I checked the clock and, thankfully, had just enough time to get dressed and change Mackenzie out of the peanut butter covered clothes. I threw on some maternity shorts and an Underoath band shirt that I had gotten free with one of their albums. Claire was decked out from head to toe. I never used to understand why moms would dress their kids so much better than they dressed themselves until I became a mom myself – it's more fun, it's more adorable, and it's we usually get more judged on.

I grabbed Claire's car seat from her room, thankful that I took it out of the car to wash the seat cover, and Claire and I waited outside. Butterflies began to form in my stomach. I couldn't understand why I was so nervous. It wasn't like there was anything going on between Edward and me. We were both married. We both only had friendship on our minds. Yeah, that and the idea of our spouses cheating on us together.


	16. Chapter 15

I don't own any of the characters. They belong to Stephanie Meyer.

* * *

Within 5 minutes of us getting outside, Edward pulled up in a metallic green Ford Windstar. Points to him for driving a mom-mobile. I refused to get one. I vow to never be one of _those _moms. I grabbed Claire's hand, her car seat in the other, and began walking over to the van.

"Hey!' Edward said loudly to us, waving while walking in our direction. "Don't you be carrying all of that! Give me the car seat. I'll put it in the van. Just get Miss Claire over to the van and I'll buckle her in, too. You need to go sit inside it, though. You look like you just ran a marathon. Your cheeks make you look like Santa."

"Oh, I know," I said with a slight laugh. I don't think we've really reached the point of joking so casually, but I wouldn't fight it. "I don't know why. I'm not over exerting myself. I don't feel too warm. Maybe this is my version of a 'glow' this time around."

"Well, atleast it gives you a healthy look to your face." Edward flashed a brilliant grin at me. I think I blushed, but I'm not entirely sure. "Come on," he said, motioning Claire and me toward him. "Her seat is all ready."

We got right to the door when a chorus of "HIHIHI!" began from the backseat.

"Hi Garret! Hi Kate! It's good to see you guys again!" I was genuinely happy to see them. I loved kids. Even when I was a little girl, I always knew I wanted to be a mommy. Many people claim I'm the "Baby Whisperer".

"Hi! Hi! Hi!" Claire chimed in and I loaded her into her car seat. She never had a problem making friends.

After getting Claire securely strapped in, I climbed up the mountain to the passenger side seat, all the while being laughed at by Edward.

"I'd lend you a hand," he said, "but I'm afraid you may slap it away. You seem too independent to want the help." He was very observant, to say the least. And yet, he hadn't tried checking out my new, fuller, curvier pregnancy breasts. Score for him.

Once I finally made it into the van and got buckled in, Edward backed out of the driveway and we began on the, bound to be awkward, journey to my OB-GYN.

"So," Edward treaded slowly with his words, "how far along are you?"

"Oh, just about 28 weeks. Not too far, but far enough to make me uncomfortable, you know?" I always had to grit this answer through my teeth. Everyone and their brother asks me how far along I am. It really gets annoying after so many times.

"You don't look like you're that far along. You carry it well." Edward knew how to compliment a woman. More points for him. "I'm guessing everything is going well?"

"Well, everything is okay, but I've had to go to the hospital twice for preterm labor and high blood pressure. They were able to stop it, but they don't think I'll make it to full gestation. I'm probably going to be lucky to make it to 37 weeks." That much I'd tell him. That was friendly conversation. I wasn't about to admit to anyone how scared the idea of having a preemie was to me. It would break my heart to see my baby in an incubator with wires and tubes all over her. I don't know how all the mothers in the world could handle that.

"Oh, well I hope for the best for you. Anya ended up having to deliver Garret early because she had preeclampsia. I wouldn't wish it on anyone." He was sure sympathetic for a man. Or maybe I just wasn't used to it.

"Poor thing." I tried to make my voice sound sympathetic, but I was still on the fence about Anya. "I wouldn't wish that on anyone." That was genuine, atleast.

"Listen, Bella," Edward had made his voice soft and soothing, like he was talking to a baby. "I'm sorry about the conversation I threw on you at your house. That was really wrong of me to do. It wasn't the time, or place, or MY place to bring it up. I have no real hard, concrete evidence to show you. I'm sure you already have a ton on your plate. I really didn't mean to make you feel stuck in the middle or untrusting."

I held my hand out to him, motioning him to stop.

"You know, Edward," I spoke slowly, choosing my words carefully, "it _did_really hurt that you'd make an accusation the way you did. You don't know my family, or me. The fact that you judged us before meeting us really cut deep. And it really doesn't help that words cut so deep that they kind of "scar" into our minds. You can't just erase it like at Etch-A-Sketch or a MagnaDoodle. They're always going to be there now. You placed something in my head that shouldn't be there."

Edward's face dropped. He looked solid, almost emotionless, glazed eyes fixated on the road ahead of him. His hands gripped tight to the steering wheel. _Great_, I thought. _I didn't mean to hurt him, but it serves him right._

"I'm sorry," Edward sighed. "I know the amount of times I say it won't do anything to fix the damage, but Bella, you really need to hear me out. I've known in the back of my head that Anya has been cheating on me. I just never wanted to come to terms with it. I just thought that maybe if I gave her some freedom, things would change. I could keep the kids, she could leave for a weekend, and she'd come back well rested. I thought maybe she was distancing herself because I was taking her for granted. But nothing was ever good enough to change how she was."

Edward's eyes went from glazed to glistening as they slowly filled with tears that refused to fall down his cheeks. I knew he had to get this out. I knew part of him would feel better. I didn't want to, but I had to let him continue. It would make me feel better, too.

"I could see she wasn't happy. Hell, I could feel it in her touch. Every kiss was like a strategically planned maneuver: quick, precise, and cold. Sleeping next to her in bed may have meant us sleeping in different countries. And I know, I'm not home a lot. But I put in vacation time because of this. I'm on the brink of losing my job, and for what? To be given the cold shoulder and looked at with disgust and hatred? No. I wanted to keep my family together, give the kids the life they should have. But this is all just getting to be too much." The hot tears began slipping down his cheeks. They came faster and faster now, until the tears turned into sobs. He was forced to pull over to the side of the road.

I unbuckled myself and put a hand on his shoulder. I looked in the backseat, which had become quiet soon after we left my driveway. All the kids had fallen asleep peacefully, Claire drooling away.

"Edward, please don't blame yourself for this." I had to try and be sympathetic, comforting – a girl. I was really bad in situations like this. "You work hard to provide for them. You make sacrifices so they can have not just the things they need, but the things they want. And if Anya can't see that, then maybe she doesn't deserve you. I know it's hard to see, but you could almost make it out as she's doing you a favor. It's a farfetched idea, I know, but it's a nice light at the end of the tunnel, right?"

Edward quietly wiped his eyes with the edge of his sleeve on his t-shirt.

"I guess you're right," he said between trying to slow his breath. "Anya and I grew apart. There was no way we could fight that. But Kate and Garret, they didn't ask for any of this. What do I tell them in the future after their mom fills their head with crap about me being a deadbeat and never being around?" A new round of sobs took over his body, and his back and shoulders shook with each one.

"Edward," I said, taking his hand gently, "please, listen to me. There's no sense in fighting an uphill battle. She's obviously made her decision in this. The only thing you're going to end up doing is making yourself miserable trying to be all that you can be for her. And when that isn't enough, you're going to end up in a nuthouse. Things will work out for you. It's good karma. You just need to let the pieces fall where they may."

Edward slowed his breathing and all but stopped his sobs to a mere few tears left stuck in his red, bloodshot eyes. He relaxed back into his seat and realized he was holding my hand. We both pulled away from the other quickly and sat awkwardly for a few seconds, which seemed like an eternity, in silence.

"Okay, we need to get you to your appointment. I'd hate to make you late, especially with the problems you've had so far." Edward composed himself even more, wiped his face with his shirt and started the van. He pulled back into his lane with ease and we returned to our leisurely drive with the flowing traffic. "But thank you for listening to me, Bella. I didn't realize how much I needed to get it out of my system."

"It's no problem, Edward." I was careful to not say "anytime". Once you open that floodgate of emotional support, there's no closing it. I'm not ready to handle that.

Instead of leaving the rest of the ride in an awkward silence, Edward turned the radio on to the local classic rock station. The van filled with Warrant, Journey, Alice Cooper, and all the great bands that'll never go out of style. My eyes were in music Heaven. I leaned my head back into the headrest and let the sounds of Poison fill my mind.

"I miss the days of good music." Edward was trying to make small talk. Poor guy. Having an emotional breakdown in front of a pregnant woman while driving a mom mobile must be means of losing atleast 2 man cards.

"Well, I guess that depends on what you consider 'good' music." And here we go - another debate about my eclectic music tastes and how I jump around too much. I've heard it all before.

"Oh, don't get me wrong. I'm not picky. I like just about anything, but classic rock really holds a special place in my heart. It's where my best memories are. High school days without a care in the world besides trying to see a girl's rack, spending hours of doing nothing with friends in random basements or garages, but still having the time of my life. I love where I'm at right now, but there are some days when I wish I could go back. Just for a day." Wow. This guy is deep. I don't even know how to come back to make conversation with this. I'm not used to having someone else share my same opinion.

"Well, that was a nice way to pretty up getting high and trying to cop a feel," I said with a good laugh.

Edward looked shocked for a minute, then let a chuckle slip out, then a giggle, then a full blown laugh.

"Yeah," he managed to squeeze out. "I guess that IS all we did back then. But it was still awesome."

"Ah, don't worry," I said while still giggling. "I think we've all done it. Atleast you probably had friends that looked out for you. My best friend, almost my sister, took me out on a 4 wheeler before my first date with Jacob and got me covered in mud without time to change."

"Oh my God." Edward's eyes were wide, but he was trying to hold back on the laughs. "You're kidding me, right?"

"Nope, unfortunately, I'm not," I admitted. "Alice's a bitch now, but she was a bigger bitch back then, and no one messed with her. It was either be her friend or be her enemy. Her friend list was highly exclusive, but you didn't want to be on her enemy list. Lucky me, I was on the friend list, but I always felt like I danced on the line with what she had me do sometimes."

We both had a good laugh and were in high spirits, finally. No awkward tension, no deafening silence. This was nice.

"So, how did you meet Anya?" I didn't want the conversation to end.

"We actually went to school together." Edward pushed his eyebrows together, trying to remember the bits and pieces of the good ol' days as best as he could. "We were in home economics together, but I never noticed her until we were science lab partners. We had two totally different groups of friends, so we wouldn't have met otherwise.

I walked into my 5th period class and there she was, wearing glasses, slightly oversized shirt, ragged jeans, and a mile high pile of books on her desk. I thought she'd help me get an easy A, so I hopped on the stool right next to hers. I flashed her my most charismatic smile and had her hooked.

She did all my work for the first quarter, until her friends intervened. They all told her 'He's just using you!' They were right, but she didn't need to know that," he said with a laugh.

"She believed them after I asked her to write my 5 page essay about water. I told her I wanted a catchy title, something like 'Hydrogen and Oxygen:: The Ultimate Threesome'. She didn't care for that too much, so she quit doing my part of the work.

The first lab we had to do that she left me on my own, we were working with combustible things. I had no idea what I was doing, and she refused to help me, so I just started mixing things in beakers. One thing led to another, and next thing you know, one of my beakers spilled and ate away all the fabric of her shirt. She got pretty popular after that."

"High school boys and the female anatomy, the largest infatuation known to this day," I jested while nodding. "How did you snag her after that?"

"Well.." He strung that out for a bit. "I tried to apologize, but she refused to listen to me. I offered to take her to dinner, but she said my little 'fiasco' gave her too many dates to keep up with, so going out with me wasn't high on her priority list. Back then, I loved a challenge, and she was a big one. So I sent her flowers, chocolates, the whole 9 yards. And none of it worked."

"So, then what worked?" I was genuinely intrigued.

"Just my personal charm, intelligence and wit."

"And that breaks down to…?"

"I crushed some Viagra up and put it in one of the things we were making in home ec. I ate a bite and convinced her that something she put in the food caused this 'massive moment of embarrassment' and stormed away." Edward had a smirk on his face when he explained that last part. "In layman's terms, she felt guilty and jumped on me like a spider monkey."

I laughed until I was blue in the face. What a story to tell the grandkids.

"Oh, it's the right turn up there!" I pointed up the street just a bit ahead of us. Edward turned and parked in the small parking lot. That ride seemed like forever, but I had high hopes for the ride home.

We took all three kids out of the van, somewhat unwillingly as they were groggy and still sleepy, and brought them all inside the lobby area. We decided after parking that it would be ridiculous to make Edward go home, only to just turn around and come back. He'd watch the kids in the waiting room and hopefully everything would go smooth.

While Edward and the kids got situated, he in a chair and the kids around a bin of toys, I went to the front desk and signed my name in.

"My, aren't we looking flushed! Are you feeling okay?" The receptionist was always a polite woman, sincerely cheerful and concerned.

"Oh, I'm fine. I'm sure it was just me laughing so hard in the drive here." I still had a smile on my face,

"Oh, alright dear." The receptionist smiled back. "Just go ahead and have a seat. I'll call you back when one of the doctors become available."

That was the downside to this building. The doctors were all amazing with high reputations, but they were almost always so busy that I never got stuck with just one. However, it gave me a good chance to get to know all of them on a somewhat personal level.

I went and sat a couple chairs away from Edward and grabbed a magazine, waiting for them to call me back. I hoped this appointment wouldn't last forever. I was ready and eager to get back in the van and pick up on the conversation where we left off.


End file.
